Screen Name: Justin
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Heroes, Lost, Family Guy, South Park, The Office
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Favorite Movie Quotes:
"Adventure, Excitement, A Jedi Craves Not These Things"
"Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me."
"We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off."
"In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns."
"Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me."
"We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off."
"In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns."
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Todd McFarlane's animated series Spawn has developed a large cult following. This four-disc set collects the first three seasons of that show. Each episode is presented in its original broadcast aspect ratio of 1.33:1. The English soundtrack is rendered in Dolby Digital Surround, while a Spanish soundtrack has been recorded in Dolby Digital Mono. English, Spanish, and French subtitles are accessible. Each series is contained on its own disc, while a fourth disc includes an interview with McFarlane that can be accessed by anyone with a DVD-ROM drive. This is a great disc for animation enthusiasts. ~ Perry Seibert, All Movie Guide
After a recruitment scandal, a struggling college football team is forced to turn to a rag-tag group of misfits in this sports comedy. It seems that Texas State University's football team has relied on some rather unorthodox -- and illegal -- methods to gain players, resulting in the disqualification of most of the team's stars. The desperate coach (Hector Elizondo) must rely on the school's actual students, a motley crew of unlikely characters that includes a female place kicker and a quarterback in his thirties. Unexpectedly, however, the coach discovers that the passer still has a heck of an arm, and suddenly the team again has a chance. The expected comic complications and obvious bits of slapstick follow as this band of eccentrics struggles to find a way to victory, resulting in a familiar reprise of a well-worn storyline. ~ Judd Blaise, All Movie Guide
The directorial debut of filmmaker Jared Hess, who also co-wrote the screenplay, Napoleon Dynamite is a quirky, offbeat comedy set in the small Idaho town of Preston. Jon Heder stars in the titular role, a carrot-topped oddball with a decidedly eccentric family that includes his llama-loving, dune-buggy enthusiast grandmother. The story centers on the local high school's race for class president. Using some nontraditional means, Napoleon is determined to help his pal Pedro (Efrem Ramirez) run a winning campaign and defeat popular girl Summer (Haylie Duff). Also starring The Drew Carey Show's Diedrich Bader, Napoleon Dynamite premiered at the 2004 Sundance Film Festival. ~ Matthew Tobey, All Movie Guide
Tommy Fawkes (Oliver Platt) is a struggling stand-up comedian who has tried for years to get out from under the shadow of his father, George Fawkes (Jerry Lewis), himself a famous humorist. Tommy finally scores a showcase spot at a major resort in Las Vegas, but when opening night rolls around, Tommy's act is an unqualified disaster, with the failure made even more painful by his father's presence in the audience. In search of a fresh start, Tommy heads to Blackpool, England, where he was born and raised, to look for a new act. Hoping to buy material from local performers, Tommy auditions a large number of acts, most of whom are utterly hopeless, until he sees a hilarious vaudeville team, the Parker Brothers. Their act seems more than a bit familiar, however, and Tommy soon realizes that they're doing his father's old material. But they have every right to be doing George's schtick -- it seems George stole his act from the Parkers ages ago. What's more, the younger and more eccentric of the Parker Boys, Jack (Lee Evans), is actually Tommy's half brother, the product of a fling with a Blackpool showgirl years ago. Veering between comedy and drama, Funny Bones has more than its share of effective moments on either side of the fence, and features fine supporting performances from Oliver Reed, Leslie Caron and Harold Nicholas. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide
Shawn Levy directs the family-oriented comedy Cheaper by the Dozen, a loose remake of the 1950 film starring Clifton Webb and Myrna Loy, which was itself based on a novel. Tom (Steve Martin) and Kate Baker (Bonnie Hunt) have made many sacrifices in their professional lives in order to raise their 12 children. When Tom is offered a job as a Division I college football coach, he moves the entire pack to a suburb of Chicago. This move shakes up the whole family, especially when Kate's memoirs get published and she takes off on a book tour. The lack of parental guidance creates problems for all the Baker kids, particularly handsome jock Charlie (Tom Welling), fashion plate Lorraine (Hilary Duff), and grown child Nora (Piper Perabo). Ashton Kucher stars in a cameo role as Nora's actor boyfriend, Hank. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
M. Night Shyamalan writes and directs this self-proclaimed, grown-up "bedtime story" about an apartment building superintendent named Cleveland (Paul Giamatti) who discovers a magical sea-nymph named Story (Bryce Dallas Howard) who's been transported to this world and is living in the building's own swimming pool. As this bizarre revelation sinks in, Cleveland becomes enraptured by her other-worldly charm. As he shelters her in his apartment, other inhabitants of the building begin falling into place as representations of characters from an Eastern myth in which these mermaids, or "narfs," co-exist unhappily with more beastly and violent characters. In human reality, the forces of darkness that threaten the heroes of a fairy tale prove to be much more terrifying, and the victory of good over evil is by no means guaranteed. Jeffery Wright, Jared Harris and Mary Beth Hurt co-star, as well as Shyamalan himself, playing the visionary writer Vick. ~ Cammila Albertson, All Movie Guide
A woman discovers that a part of her family history may be more complicated -- and more famous -- than she ever imagined in this comedy. Thirtysomething Sarah Huttinger (Jennifer Aniston), who has spent most of her adult life in New York City, is flying home to California with her long time boyfriend, Jeff Daly (Mark Ruffalo), for the wedding of her annoyingly perky younger sister, Annie (Mena Suvari). While Sarah and Jeff have recently announced they're engaged to be married, Sarah has been having second thoughts, and she isn't excited about the prospect of spending time with the family where she's always felt like the odd duck. As Sarah tries to decide what she should do with her personal and professional lives, she turns to her sharp-tongued and still youthful grandmother, Katharine (Shirley MacLaine), for advice, and Katharine shares a little-known bit of family history -- that Sarah's now-deceased mother left her father, Earl (Richard Jenkins), a few days before their wedding and ran off with another man for several days before coming back and marrying Earl. However, after hearing this Sarah is also treated to some long-simmering local gossip about a young man who ran off with a bride-to-be after he was seduced by her mother...and that the story became the basis for the hit movie The Graduate. Sarah begins to wonder, was Katharine the real-life Mrs. Robinson of this story? And if it's true, who was the man who had affairs with Sarah's mother and grandmother? Was it dashing and wealthy family friend Beau Burroughs (Kevin Costner), who has also turned Sarah's head? Rumor Has It... was produced from an original screenplay by Ted Griffin; Griffin was originally set to direct the film, but shortly after production began he was replaced, with Rob Reiner taking over the project. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide
Legendary Hong Kong action director and choreographer Corey Yuen brings Tecmo's best-selling video-game franchise to the big screen in a martial arts extravaganza featuring an impressive quartet of female fighters including Devon Aoki, Sarah Carter, Jaime Pressly, and Holly Valance. Tina (Pressly), Christie (Valance), Kasumi (Aoki), and Helena (Carter) are four skilled martial artists whose outwardly sexy appearances betray their true lethal natures. When the fearsome females each receive an invitation to take part in an illegal martial arts competition to be staged on a remote Asian island, the prospect of a ten-million-dollar top prize is only sweetened by the fact that they will be facing off against some of the toughest fighters on the planet. Now, in order to defend their honor and search for the answers to life's greatest mysteries, Tina, Christie, Kasumi, and Helena will check their inhibitions at the beach and prepare for a series of fights that will test not only their strength, stamina, and endurance, but the very foundation of their dedication to the martial arts as well. ~ Jason Buchanan, All Movie Guide
