David Lipman Movies

Woody Allen's tenth film as writer/director, Stardust Memories opens with a scene reminiscent of the opening of 8 1/2 and continues to use that film for inspiration. Sandy Bates (Allen) sits in a train at a train station, the car filled with very unhappy looking people. In a train on another set of tracks, Bates sees a wonderful party going on. A beautiful woman blows him a kiss as the happy train pulls out of the station. Bates is a famous film director who has been invited to attend a festival of his work being held at the Stardust hotel. He attends the event, but is ceaselessly harassed by fans who accost him and repel him in equal measure. While consistently hearing the complaints from fans, critics, and even space aliens that his earlier comedies are superior to his dramatic work, Bates juggles a trio of women in his private life. His encounters during the course of the retrospective force Bates to take a long look at himself. Sharon Stone makes one of her first film appearances as the woman who blows Sandy a kiss. ~ Perry Seibert, All Movie Guide

This TV-movie biography of legendary black ballplayer Leroy "Satchel" Paige unfortunately whitewashes and hokes up his fascinating story. Louis Gossett Jr. stars as Paige, who spends virtually his entire professional career in the Negro leagues because of the "gentlemen's agreement" barring African-Americans from the Majors. Paige's prowess as a pitcher is so famous that he becomes the highest-paid player in the Negro leagues -- but as for joining the mainstream teams, the answer is always the same: "If only you were white." When Jackie Robinson is signed by the Dodgers in 1946, the doors open for other black ballplayers; thus it is that in 1948, Satchel Paige becomes the first black pitcher in the American leagues...at the tender age of 42. Don't Look Back down-pedals Satchel Paige's tempestuous private life (his two marriages are combined into one, for example), and tends to shortchange the viewer in the crucial ball-playing scenes. Its saving grace is the towering performance by star Louis Gossett Jr., who struggles manfully to overcome the script's shortcomings. When the film was first telecast on May 31, 1981, the real Satchel Paige appeared in the prologue; one year later, Paige was dead at the (reported) age of 76. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

The members of an all-girl rock band, hoping to make it big, team up with the members of a sorority house to beat boys at a number of sporting events in order to keep their house from folding. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

In this teen comedy, the employees at a posh hotel go to war with the resort's snooty guests. ~ Jason Ankeny, All Movie Guide

One's enjoyment of Road Lawyers and Other Briefs is contingent upon one's fondness for student film projects. Three of the segments in this four-part film are student-produced short subjects, with the expected sharp variance in quality. "Road Lawyers" is a broad takeoff of the Mad Max school, its single joke given away by its title. "Escape from Heaven" is all about a nun whose chattering piety drives everyone crazy. And "Hairline" concerns itself with...a hairline. The final segment of this omnibus feature is a gagged-up snippet from the 1951 Republic serial Radar Men From the Moon, which was "funny" enough originally without the overdubbed dialogue. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Adventurous viewers not repelled by the title of this horror exploitation-comedy from Frank Henenlotter (director of the splatter cult classic Basket Case) will find a fair share of laughs on display, thanks to Henenlotter's typically energetic devil-may-care brand of gruesome humor. James Lorinz tears up acres of scenery as Jeffrey Franken, a neurotic electrician and aspiring mad scientist, who goes completely 'round the bend after his slightly pudgy girlfriend (former Penthouse pet, Patty Mullen) is shredded by his latest invention, a remote-control lawn mower. Preserving her head in his mom's freezer, he sets out to acquire shapely female parts to rebuild the rest of her, focusing his search on the city's red-light district. After watching a news feature on crack addiction among local prostitutes, Franken hits on the solution and invents a formula for "supercrack," which triggers the spontaneous detonation of anyone who smokes it. After blowing apart a hotel roomful of unfortunate ladies, he spirits their scattered limbs home to his garage laboratory, where his patchwork creation is eventually brought to life in a hilarious lift from The Bride of Frankenstein. Apparently, her brain spent too much time bobbing in the same preservative bath used for the hooker-parts, since she is instantly compelled to peddle her assets on every street corner in town, resulting in the high-voltage deaths of several johns (who are not entirely dissatisfied with their choice of demise). Her exploits reach the attention of sadistic pimp Zorro (Joseph Gonzalez), who, obsessed with finding the person responsible for blowing up his women, tracks her back to Franken's lab for the inevitable (and quite disgusting) confrontation. Basically a collection of crude but hilarious sight gags (Franken's predilection for plunging a power drill into his own skull; the pimp knocked senseless by flying severed limbs) and goofy throwaway dialogue, this may offer guilty pleasures for fans of Henenlotter's comic theater of the absurd. Frankenhooker is available on video in R and unrated versions, some featuring a suitably tacky slipcase, which, when pressed, screeches the words "Wanna date?" ~ Cavett Binion, All Movie Guide

Adam Arkin guest stars as George Costas, the Greek-immigrant owner of a New York jewelry business. After killing two intruders in his store, both of whom had long police records, Costas pleads self-defense: "They shoot at me, I shoot back, I killed them." But as all the facts come to light, the D.A.'s office arrives at the conclusion that Costas had appointed himself judge, jury, and executioner long before anyone pulled the trigger. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Detectives Logan (Chris Noth) and Cerella (Paul Sorvino) swing into action when a Chinese-American honors student is killed. At first, it seems as though an Asian street gang was responsible for the killing. Then, more evidence comes to surface, leading to an intense scholarship competition and a dangerously ambitious family. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

When they discover that their deceased boss had stashed away two million illegally embezzled dollars in a Caribbean safe deposit box, two co-workers decide to claim the cash. To do so, however, they must convince everyone the boss is actually alive -- a situation which seems oddly familiar to them both. This sequel to the popular 1989 comedy Weekend at Bernie's promises more of the same: slapstick with an amazingly lifelike corpse at the center. Whatever freshness the premise may have once had has vanished, however, and the occasionally clever set pieces become lost under the weight of a number of cluttered subplots. ~ Judd Blaise, All Movie Guide

When an African-American honors student is found murdered, detectives Logan (Chris Noth) and Briscoe (Jerry Orbach) dig up evidence that the dead girl was stealing from her family to support a drug habit. The number-one suspect is the girl's sleazy crack-dealing boyfriend, but for reasons that defy explanation, he will not plea-bargain with the D.A.'s office. Meanwhile, the search goes on for the missing murder weapon -- or has it been deliberately hidden by a hitherto unsuspected party? ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

A pedestrian is struck and killed by a truck. An accident? Not so, insist the detectives and the D.A.'s office, especially when evidence reveals a link connecting the victim, a prominent baby food manufacturer, and the Russian mafia. Assistant D.A. Stone (Michael Moriarty) promises that no harm will befall an important witness -- a promise which he is tragically unable to keep. This final fourth season episode of Law & Order also represented the series swan song of co-star Michael Moriarty. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

What at first seems to be a random shooting is eventually revealed to be a deliberate murder attempt. Furthermore, the victim's wife had been previously wed to a man who died in an inadequately investigated accident. When the original case is re-opened, the detectives and the lawyers find themselves with overabundant evidence of a deadly and long-standing vendetta. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide