Sandra Bernhard Movies
It might be stretching things to suggest that American comedienne Sandra Bernhard's off-kilter spin on life was caused by her family's moving from the cozy confines of Michigan to the rough-and-tumble expanses of Arizona. One gets the feeling that Bernhard would have been on the outside looking in wherever she went. Utilizing her outsized lips and jutting chin for comic effect, Bernhard became a standup comedian at age 19, and two years later got her first big break as a regular on the short-lived Richard Pryor Show (where the press release misspelled her name as Bernhart). Her act, which like all good comedy acts was better seen than described, consisted of cutting-edge commentary about sexual stereotyping and survival; one felt compelled to laugh lest Bernhard bolt from the stage and physically assault the audience. This dangerous quality carried over into her star-making film role in King of Comedy, as a psychotic fan of talk show host Jerry Lewis. While Bernhard's funkiness worked in this film's favor, it was detrimental to her villainous turn in the 1990 fiasco Hudson Hawk, though she was no worse than any other element of this notorious bomb. A tireless creator of comedy, Bernhard has scored with her 1985 best-selling record album I'm Your Woman, her 1988 solo off-Broadway show Without You I'm Nothing (made into a film in 1990), and her autobiography Confessions of a Pretty Lady. While she spent much of her early career skirting around the subject of her own sexual preferences, in recent years Bernhard has "outed" herself, which has added an extra layer of public fascination to her onetime close friendship with Madonna, as well as her recurring appearances on the TV sitcom Roseanne. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1979
In this abysmal, tasteless farce, the pitfalls of patient and staff life in a big city hospital are supposed to be the brunt of the jokes, but there are no living jokes in this film. In the first several scenes, the obnoxious know-it-all Fats (Charles Haid) introduces new interns to the hospital with an aggressive monologue that exhorts them to stay away from the patients and basically do exactly the opposite of what the Hippocratic Oath enjoins. Everything spirals downhill from there. Later on, an intern quits in disgust but returns to the hospital when one of his friends needs his medical expertise. As an example of the hilarious behavior of the protagonists, a female doctor does an autopsy while she herself is bare to the waist. Certainly her scalpel might have been put to better use by excising that scene and then transplanting another movie onto this one. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Tim Matheson, Charles Haid, (more)
More a "greatest hits" movie than an actual stand-alone film of its own, Shogun Assassin is the delirious hybrid of two episodes of the popular Baby Cart series dubbed into English and fused together into a hyper-violent bloodbath ballet that's sure to entertain the samurai-film enthusiast with a strong stomach. The swords fly fast and furious as a wondering shogun is forced into exile after being framed and his wife murdered. Giving his infant son the choice between the merciful release of death (represented by a ball) and the life of constant threat and danger (a sword) the child reaches for the sword, marking the beginning of a brutally violent struggle for survival among a sea of would-be assassins. From this point on plot is secondary, focusing instead on a series of violent vignettes in which limbs fly freely in a furious blur of lightning swords. Utilizing masterful swordsmanship in addition to a cleverly designed and lethal baby carriage, father and son are in a constant state of ultra-alert adrenalized awareness, conscious that instant death may lurk beyond every carefully chosen path. ~ Jason Buchanan, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Tomisaburo Wakayama, Masahiro Tomikawa, (more)
- 1981
- R
- Add Cheech and Chong's Nice Dreams to QueueAdd Cheech and Chong's Nice Dreams to top of Queue
Here, the dope-smoking duo are working on an ice-cream truck, and their specially treated confections are more than just a hit for the kids. Nice Dreams is the third in the series. ~ John Bush, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong, (more)
- 1983
This collection of comedy routines features some of the best--and in some cases, earliest--performances of stand-up comics as they compete in the annual Laff-Off contests. Performers include Eddie Murphy, Sandra Bernhard, Harry Anderson, and more while David Steinberg introduces the segments. ~ Kristie Hassen, All Movie Guide
Martin Scorsese's satirical comedy/drama caustically explores the lengths to which a nobody will go to be as famous as his idol. Practicing his patter in his basement with cardboard cut-outs of his favorite celebrities, mediocre aspiring comedian Rupert Pupkin (Robert De Niro) believes that one appearance on the evening talk show of the Johnny Carson-esque Jerry Langford (Jerry Lewis) will be his ticket to stardom. After he helps Jerry escape the advances of amorous fan Masha (Sandra Bernhard), Rupert takes Jerry's patronizing brush-off as a true promise for an audition and begins haunting Jerry's office. Provoked by Masha's needling and a rejection from Jerry's smooth production exec Cathy Long (Shelley Hack), Rupert makes a disastrous trip to Jerry's country house with embarrassed date Rita (Diahnne Abbott), then hatches an even more outlandish scheme to get ahead. With Masha's help, Rupert kidnaps Jerry and demands as ransom the TV appearance that he believes will turn his fantasy into reality. ~ Lucia Bozzola, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Robert De Niro, Jerry Lewis, (more)
- 1985
- G
- Add Sesame Street Presents: Follow that Bird to QueueAdd Sesame Street Presents: Follow that Bird to top of Queue
The first film to be adapted from the popular children's television series Sesame Street, Follow That Bird follows the story of Big Bird after a social worker (Sally Kellerman) takes him away from Sesame Street to live with a family of birds in Illinois. Unhappy in his new surroundings, Big Bird attempts to hitchhike back home to Sesame Street. Over the course of his journey he meets a number of odd and charming characters, in the form of cameos by Chevy Chase, Sandra Bernhard, Waylon Jennings, Dave Thomas and John Candy. The music for this engaging family film was written by Van Dyke Parks and Lennie Niehaus. ~ Stephen Thomas Erlewine, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Carroll Spinney, Jim Henson, (more)
- 1986
This hilarious comedy video contains performances from some of the funniest stand-up comedians of the 1980s as they do their schtick at the Improv comedy clubs. Performers include funnyman/magician Harry Anderson, Billy Crystal, and Michael Keaton. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide
In this comedy, a relocation to Florida throws lowlife New Yorkers Barney (Paul Rodriguez) and Jake (Michael O'Keefe) into a dilemma when Jake falls for a beautiful schoolteacher, Olivia Farragut (Lucinda Jenney), who is struggling to find enough money to keep her school open. However, when they discover that Olivia stands to inherit a fortune, if only she will marry a true gentlemen, Jake decides to transform himself into the epitome of good breeding. ~ Iotis Erlewine, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Michael O'Keefe, Paul Rodriguez, (more)
In the late '80s, good-time girl Stacy (Lea Thompson) and her timid friend, Melissa (Victoria Jackson), decide to hit a health spa for singles in hopes of spicing up their unfulfilled sex lives. Afraid of AIDS, Stacy has gone celibate, while Melissa has only ever managed to get it on with two lame guys. Arriving at the resort, the women spend their time working out, flirting with staff members, making friends and enemies with their fellow singles, and avoiding the attentions of the oafish Vinny (Andrew Dice Clay). When a cruel psychologist plays mind games with Melissa, she finds solace with Vinny, then flees the spa, interrupting an incipient romance between Stacy and a cute aerobics instructor. Wendy Goldman and Judy Toll adapted their own stage play, while Casual Sex? provided director Genevieve Robert her only feature credit to date. ~ Brian J. Dillard, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Lea Thompson, Victoria Jackson, (more)
- 1988
- R
A dissatisfied woman encounters a mysterious stranger who may be her long-lost son in this peculiar, darkly comic drama. Theresa Russell plays the deeply disappointed Linda Henry, who feels stifled by a strained marriage to Dr. Henry Henry (Christopher Lloyd), who pays more attention to his model railroads than to his wife. Desperate for diversion, she is captivated when Martin (Gary Oldman) arrives, claiming to be the child she gave up for adoption after a teenage pregnancy. She immediately bonds with this stranger, but numerous signs indicate that he may not be what he seems. Strange behavior follows from everyone involved, with some of the film's most bizarre sequences concerning Dr. Henry's toy train fetish. The complex, often ambiguous script is by noted British writer Dennis Potter, who also wrote Pennies from Heaven and The Singing Detective, and Nicolas Roeg provided his predictably stylized, enigmatic direction. Despite several interesting moments, Track 29 is far from either Potter's or Roeg's best work, and most critics found it a bizarre, ineffective muddle. ~ Judd Blaise, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Theresa Russell, Gary Oldman, (more)
Those of us who had to suffer such "instructional" films as Dating Do's and Don'ts in high school will be especially entertained by Heavy Petting. In the visually sarcastic manner of the nuclear-age documentary The Atomic Cafe, the film assembles masses of information and misinformation about teenage dating rituals of the 1950s. Clips from contemporary movies, TV programs, commercials, and "sex hygiene" short subjects are used throughout; perhaps once upon a time these vignettes could have been taken seriously, but here they're only good for howls of laughter. Interspersed among the vintage footage are interviews with such children of the 1960s as David Byrne and William S. Burroughs. One look at the 1950s as depicted in Heavy Petting, and it's easy to see how the sensuous, psychedelic '60s came to be. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- David Byrne, Sandra Bernhard, (more)
In this stylized adaptation of her 1988 off-Broadway show, singer/actress/comedian Sandra Bernhard explores celebrity, stereotypes, and her own childhood in a series of monologues and musical numbers. Although much of the material comes straight from the original stage show, Bernhard and co-writer John Boskovich updated many of her pop-cultural musings and added several new production numbers. They also turned a one-woman show into something of a mockumentary, staging interviews with Bernhard's fictional manager (Lu Leonard) and adding several additional characters. Most of the action is staged in a theater full of well-heeled African American patrons who slowly leave in disgust at Bernhard's performance, which includes her deadpan fantasies about an imagined gentile childhood, a dalliance with Warren Beatty, and a trip to Studio 54. Originally given a limited release by New Line Cinema in 1990, Without You I'm Nothing was quickly pulled from theaters when the company that produced it went bankrupt. Eventually, however, it made its was to home video and DVD. ~ Brian J. Dillard, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Sandra Bernhard, Steve Antin, (more)
Michael Lehmann directed this post-modernist hash of To Catch a Thief and The Naked Gun starring Bruce Willis as Hudson Hawk, a cat burglar who wants to go straight, but the circumstances won't allow it. The story begins in a pre-credit sequence that takes place in the renaissance. Leonardo Da Vinci (Stefano Molinari) is rushing through his Mona Lisa painting to work on his latest invention -- a machine to turn lead into bronze. But Da Vinci makes a mistake and, instead of bronze, the machine turns the lead into gold. Realizing the danger of his invention if the contraption gets into the wrong hands, he hides three parts of the apparatus inside three of his other works. Four hundred years later, Hudson Hawk, the world's greatest cat burglar, is being released from jail after pulling a ten-year stretch. He wants to retire from the profession of cat burglary and drink some cappuccino, but two screwball billionaires -- Darwin and Minerva Mayflower (Richard E. Grant and Sandra Bernhard) -- won't let him. Their nefarious plot is to steal the three Da Vinci works, restore Da Vinci's gold-making machine, and destroy the world's monetary system. They blackmail Hawks into working with them to steal the Da Vincis by threatening the life of Hawks's pal Tommy Five-Tone (Danny Aiello). Along with the power-mad billionaires, Hawks has to deal with the CIA, in the person of George Kaplan (James Coburn), breathing down his neck. He also has Vatican art restorer Anna Baragli (Andie MacDowell) falling for his smirk. ~ Paul Brenner, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Bruce Willis, Danny Aiello, (more)
- 1991
Dan and Roseanne go to a nightclub and a wedding chapel in Las Vegas with the newly married Arnie (Tom Arnold) and Nancy (Sandra Bernhard). Wayne Newton guest stars as himself. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1991
Dan and Roseanne go to Las Vegas to stand up for the wedding of Arnie (Tom Arnold) and Nancy (Sandra Bernhard in her first appearance on Roseanne). Part one of a two-part episode. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
Truth or Dare is an outrageous, insightful, carefully controlled and (to non-fans) overlong documentary of singer Madonna's 1990 Blonde Ambition tour. Though much of the film is a paean to self-love and self-aggrandizement, we are permitted to see Madonna at her worst as well as her best. Just when the audience is on the verge of giving up the flamboyant vocalist as a bad job, she displays a sudden attack of sensitivity, such as her protective attitude towards a timid homosexual in her troupe. Among the many celebrities who poke their heads into the proceedings are Warren Beatty, Sandra Bernhard, and Kevin Costner, who makes the fatal error of coming backstage to tell Madonna that he thinks she's "neat." If you've had your fill of the Material Girl, take a look at the parody documentary starring MTV's Julie Brown, Medusa: Dare to Be Truthful. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Madonna, Warren Beatty, (more)
- 1992
Dan and Arnie's (Tom Arnold) bowling team is in last place. Meanwhile, Jackie and Nancy (Sandra Bernhard) develop a friendship that excludes Roseanne. First appearance of Mark's (Glenn Quinn) brother, played by Johnny Galecki. Originally named Kevin Healy, his character name was permanently changed to David for the rest of the series. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
In this finale episode of the fourth season of Roseanne, the Conners once again are faced with a grim financial situation. Roseanne loses her job when Rodbell's diner goes out of business and Dan is out of work when he is forced to close his bike shop, Lanford Custom Cycle. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
In this conclusion of a two-part episode, Roseanne tries to make Dan feel better about losing the bike shop. The newly wed Becky and Mark (Glenn Quinn) stop by to say goodbye to Roseanne and Dan before they leave for Minneapolis. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
Nancy (Sandra Bernhard) tells Roseanne and Jackie that she is gay. (Morgan Fairchild) guest stars as Nancy's lover Marla. Meanwhile, Bev (Estelle Parsons) moves into a retirement home, making Roseanne feel old. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
Roseanne stays home while everyone else goes out to a Halloween party. She gets visited by the ghosts of Halloween Past (Lee Arenberg), Halloween Present (Mario Roccuzzo), and Halloween Future (Garry Bullock). Laurie Metcalf's daughter Zoe Perry plays Jackie as a little girl. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
Roseanne and Jackie can't seem to get a loan to start the restaurant, so they reluctantly ask their mother, Bev (Estelle Parsons), who wants to be a partner. Meanwhile, Darlene finds out that D.J. has been spying on their new next-door neighbor, Molly (Danielle Harris). ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
- 1992
Roseanne hosts a surprise party for Darlene's 16th birthday. Darlene is disgusted and dyes her hair jet black, then Roseanne lets her leave while the adults enjoy the party. Meanwhile, the Tildens move in next door to the Conners and Roseanne contemplates joining in on a business opportunity with Jackie. ~ Andrea LeVasseur, All Movie Guide
