Daniel Von Bargen Movies

Somehow or other, Kramer's (Michael Richards) purchase of a meat slicer qualifies him to diagnose the significance of a growth on the chest of George's (Jason Alexander) new boss. Jerry finds out that dating an attractive dermatologist (played by Desperate Housewives' Marcia Cross) can be an adulterated bore. And Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) resorts to drastic measures to counteract the noisemaking activities of her rude neighbor. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

Woody Allen's black-and-white curiosity piece is a mixture of influences -- from German silent film expressionism to Franz Kafka's nightmare worlds to the contemporary fables of Wim Wenders. Woody Allen plays the nebbish clerk Kleinman (in a throwback to his characters from Sleeper and Love and Death), who is awakened in the middle of the night by a vigilante group who want him to help capture a serial killer on the loose. Kleinman reluctantly agrees, but when he gets to the street, the vigilantes are gone and Kleinmen spends most of the film wandering the shadowy back alleys in search of the citizen's brigade. Meanwhile, a circus is in town. When sword-swallower Irmy (Mia Farrow) catches her creepy clown husband (John Malkovich) getting familiar with trapeze artist Marie (Madonna), she packs her bags and heads for town, where she meets up with Kleinman. This meeting sets up a number of plot lines that has Irmy befriending a trio of prostitutes (Jodie Foster, Lily Tomlin and Kathy Bates) at the local brothel and accepting $700 from a university student (John Cusack) who wants to sleep with her. She finally meets up with her husband, and they then find an abandoned baby which they decide to raise as their own. ~ Paul Brenner, Rovi

Two socialites find their view of the world changed when a young man takes advantage of their preconceptions in this thoughtful comedy-drama. Flan and Ouisa Kittredge (Donald Sutherland and Stockard Channing) are a married couple who have built highly successful careers as art dealers catering to Manhattan's upper crust. The Kittredges are entertaining friends one evening when a young black man named Paul (Will Smith) appears at their door. Paul says that he's a close friend of their children, with whom he attended boarding school, and he's just been mugged and needs to get off the street for a moment. Flan and Ouisa invite him in, and they are immediately taken by Paul's intelligence and charm; he offers to prepare dinner, regales them with stories about his father, Sidney Poitier, and ends up spending the night at their apartment. However, the next morning Flan and Ouisa discover that they've been had; Paul is actually a con artist from the streets who has been pulling the wool over the eyes of many of their friends -- and his actions are beginning to have serious consequences. John Guare adapted the script from his own successful stage play; the supporting cast includes Ian McKellen, Mary Beth Hurt, Bruce Davison, and Heather Graham. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi

A handful of state troopers are put in the uncomfortable position of having to actually enforce the law in this high-spirited comedy. Mac (Steve Lemme), Thorny (Jay Chandrasekhar), Foster (Paul Stoter), and Rabbit (Erik Stolhanske) are four Vermont state troopers whose dedication to duty is not exactly an inspiration to law enforcement officers everywhere. Stationed in a small town near the Canadian border, the troopers don't have much to do, so they while away their hours smoking dope and harassing hapless motorists. Their superior officer, Capt. O'Hagan (Brian Cox), likes the boys and they try to keep their more outrageous antics out of his earshot, but they often run afoul of fellow trooper Farva (Kevin Heffernan), who insists on doing things by the book. When Governor Jessman (Lynda Carter) announces massive budget cuts for Vermont law enforcement personnel, things look bad for the troopers and they must quickly prove their worth or they'll be forced to look for real jobs. Appropriately enough, the troopers stumble upon some information regarding a group of marijuana dealers operating along the border; the guys figure this is just the sort of high-profile bust that could save their careers, but the police department of a nearby town gets wind of the troopers' plans. The Earlville police are no friends of the troopers, and they set out to ruin their moment of glory. Super Troopers was written by the five-man comedy troupe Broken Lizard, who also star as the five troopers; the group's leader, Jay Chandrasekhar, directed. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi

Bryan Brown stars as CIA hit man Michael Grant, who plans to retire after one more assignment. He buys a house in New Mexico from a widow (Brooke Adams), and they fall in love; only later does Michael realize his final target is the woman's father. ~ Jason Ankeny, Rovi

Kevin Costner directed and stars in this adaptation of David Brin's science fiction novel The Postman (1985), first published in 1982 issues of Isaac Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine. Costner's return to directing after his Oscar-winning Dances With Wolves(1990) is a futuristic epic depicting the aftermath of a destructive war. Some 16 years from the present day, America has been turned into a wasteland of separated communities minus a national government. A vagabond (Costner) who travels through these little villages performing Shakespeare is captured by marauders known as the Holnists, and thrown into a totalitarian labor camp run by a Hitler-like dictator, General Bethlehem (Will Patton).

Making an escape, the drifter, known to some as "Shakespeare," stumbles across an abandoned U.S. Postal Service jeep and dons the dead postal-worker's uniform. With a scheme simply to get food, he sets out to deliver 15-year-old mail, proclaiming himself The Postman, and discovers that residents accept his lies about a restored United States government because they desperately need something to believe in. This hope leads to the thought that perhaps the United States of America could indeed be restored, so an unusually inspired young man, Ford (Laren Tate) is deputized with the "Neither snow, nor rain..." oath to become the country's second Postman. At the town of Pineview, the attractive Abby (Olivia Williams), who has an impotent husband, asks The Postman to impregnate her. After Abby's husband is killed during a raid by Bethlehem, she is taken prisoner but injures Bethlehem and makes an escape. Pregnant, she spends the winter nursing the wounded Postman in a snowbound cabin. When spring comes, they emerge to discover that Ford has organized an entire squad of mail deliverers who regard The Postman as a mythical hero. The Postman reluctantly accepts his messianic role in the rebirth of the country, even as it becomes clear that the rebel force must ultimately battle and defeat the Holnist army in order to regain the American Dream. ~ Bhob Stewart, Rovi

Danny Glover plays Jerry, a caring street person who takes a mentally retarded Matthew Dillon under his wing, teaching him the survival smarts so necessary to society's left-overs. The two team up with three other vagrants in an attempt to build a nuclear group-support community and find little lasting security in the cold NYC street world. ~ Rovi

Previously adapted for German television as Operation Schmetterling, the four-part British miniseries The Writing on the Wall starred Bill Paterson in the central role of Bull. A government agent working on behalf of NATO, Bull found himself up to his neck in conspiracies and double-crosses as he tried to solve a political kidnapping. American actor Dennis Haysbert, best known for his recurring appearances as the imperiled presidential candidate in the Fox Network series 24, was seen as Sullivan. The Writing on the Wall made its first British TV appearance in 1996. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

The plot of Thinner concerns massively overweight lawyer Billy Halleck (Robert John Burke), who is receiving an oral gift from his wife (Lucinda Jenney) while driving down the street one night, when he becomes so carried away that he runs over an old Gypsy woman (Irma St. Paule), killing her. Nobody in town likes the traveling Gypsies much, so Halleck's pals -- a judge and a cop -- cover up the incident. After the cover-up, the dead woman's father, Tadzu Lempke (Michael Constantine), touches Halleck's face and whispers "thinner." Pretty soon, Halleck is losing weight at an incredible rate of more than 40 pounds a week. He tries everything, but learns that Lempke is the only man who can remove the curse. In the meantime, the judge dies of a mysterious skin ailment, and the cop commits suicide. When begging and pleading with Lempke doesn't work, Halleck turns to more drastic methods of persuasion. ~ Robert Firsching, Rovi

Jean-Claude Van Damme returns as cybernetic warrior Luc Deveraux in this sequel to the 1992 action hit. After barely surviving his experiences as a part-human/part-robot Universal Soldier, Luc has opted to stay out of the front lines and work with a military project to refine and perfect the system. However, something goes wrong (as they so often do in films like this), and S.E.T.H. (Michael Jai White), the android supercomputer leading the new breed of soldiers, suddenly develops a murderous mind of his own. Soon S.E.T.H. is leading his fellow war machines on a rampage, and Luc is the only one who can stop them. The supporting cast includes Heidi Schanz and wrestling star Bill Goldberg. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi