Marc Smith Movies

A priest discovers that being the leader of the Catholic Church can be hazardous to your health in this satiric comedy. Cardinal Rocco (Alex Rocco) and Monsignor Vitchie (Paul Bartel) are two high-ranking Vatican officials who have been using the church's business dealings to launder funds for Vittorio Corelli (Herbert Lom), a crime boss involved in illegal arms trading. After the death of the aging and infirm Pope, Rocco and Vitchie plan to nominate a successor who will go along with Corelli's schemes, but quite by accident, small town priest Giuseppe Albinizi (Robbie Coltrane) is named the new Pontiff. Albinizi is a reluctant spiritual leader who prefers cars, women, and rock & roll to church business, but when he discovers the level of Rocco's corruption, he has him removed from the Vatican. Rocco and Vitchie are not taking Albinizi's plans to clean up Vatican finances lying down, and they discover that the new Pope's has a not-so-little secret. Before he joined the priesthood, Albinizi fathered a son out of wedlock with Veronica Dante (Beverly D'Angelo); the boy grew up to be Joe Don Dante (Balthazar Getty), a rock star who's romancing Corelli's daughter. After complaints from Catholic groups in the U.S., the distributors of The Pope Must Die changed the title to The Pope Must Diet. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide

Tipping the scales on the Monty Python-esque side of broad comedy, this outrageous and classically British farce is a series of episodes involving the U.S., a small Caribbean nation, the British government, and the military. The American president is a former clown who dies after asking someone to punch him in the stomach to prove how strong he is. The vice-president (Loretta Swit) takes over and heads for trouble right away. A British island has been invaded by a Caribbean dictatorship and the gay British admiral sent to command naval operations takes a warm-hearted, 1940s-style leave of his "spouse." A Princess working as a nurse overdoes it when asked to shave a sailor for an operation. The British Prime Minister decides that if the unemployment situation could be easily solves if the employed would only jump off a cliff. And so it goes on and on, with some of the skits delving into more violent and sacrilegious themes. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

Curse of the Pink Panther was released just after Trail of the Pink Panther with a script that has someone looking for the inept Inspector Clousseau and the fabulous stolen Pink Panther diamond at the same time. In Curse, Clifton Sleigh (Ted Wass) is a New York retread of the bumbling Inspector, chosen to look for him by Clousseau's former boss because Sleigh most certainly will never find him. Although peppered with a few inventive stunts, Curse still falls short of the Sellers classics. In a bizarre side note, David Niven was himself terminally ill at the time of his appearance in Trail of the Pink Panther and unable to speak adequately. His voice was dubbed in by impressionist Rich Little. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

The second sequel to the 1976 horror hit The Omen finds Damien Thorn assuming the full mantle of the Antichrist and preparing for a final, all-out battle with "the Nazarene." Now in his thirties, Damien (Sam Neill) has elevated the family business, Thorn Industries, into the world's biggest multinational corporation. A little bit of black magic paves the way for Damien to become ambassador to England and the head of an international youth council. He soon uses this platform to amass an army of followers to do his bidding. But when Damien notices the confluence of three stars in the sky on March 24, he gets worried about the second coming of Christ. So he orders his minions to kill all the babies born on that day, warning them: "Fail, and you will be condemned to a numbing eternity in the flaccid bosom of Christ." Damien even orders his faithful private secretary, Harvey Dean (Don Gordon), to commit infanticide on his own kid, just because the guy's wife gave birth on the wrong day; a nasty incident involving laundry-room implements soon follows. Meanwhile, Damien romances Kate Reynolds (Lisa Harrow), a beautiful television anchorwoman who feels like a moth drawn to Damien's charismatic flame -- even after he brutally sodomizes her to show her how the world looks through his eyes. Things come to a head when Brother DeCarlo (Rossano Brazzi), one of a secret cabal of monks who have assembled the seven Daggers of Meggido in hopes of assassinating Damien, reveals to Kate that the Antichrist has taken her son (Barnaby Holm) under his wing. Although The Final Conflict was the final theatrical installment of the Omen series, the made-for-TV Omen IV: The Awakening appeared a decade later. ~ Brian J. Dillard, All Movie Guide

Peter Hunt directed this old fashioned -- if not reactionary -- action film about gold-mining in South Africa. The story concerns a nefarious scheme to control the international price of gold by sabotaging the country's largest gold mine, flooding it with an underground sea. Hurry Hirschfeld (Ray Milland) is a cranky but kind millionaire who owns the gold mine. His granddaughter, Terry Steyner (Susannah York), is a beautiful women suffering from the old ennui. She happens to be married to chief bad-guy Manfred Steyner (Bradford Dillman), who, along with unscrupulous international tycoon Farrell (John Gielgud), hatches the plot to flood Hurry's gold- mine. To the rescue comes Rod Slater (Roger Moore) and his faithful black sidekick Big King (Simon Sabela), ready to right the wrongs and stem the tide in order to make South Africa safe for cheap black labor. ~ Paul Brenner, All Movie Guide