Constantine Romanoff Movies

Backed by the "American GI Chorus", Nelson Eddy made his final screen appearance in the unusually elaborate Republic musical Northwest Outpost. The story is set in the 1830s, when a good portion of California was owned by Russia. US cavalry officer James Laurence (Nelson Eddy) arrives at one of the Russian colonies to pave the way for the eventual American takeover of the territory. He faces resistance in the form of Prince Nikolai Balinin (Hugo Haas), who has no intention of weakening his despotic hold over the local peasants. The plot thickens when Laurence falls in love with Natalie Alanova (Ilona Massey), the wife of disgraced nobleman Count Igor Savin (Joseph Schildkraut). The script draws several unsubtle parallels between Russian California of 1830 and Communist Russia of 1947, but this can be chalked up to the political tenor of the times. Rudolf Friml's soaring musical score evokes fond memories of Friml's earlier Rose Marie, which of course also starred Nelson Eddy. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Cecil B. DeMille's Technicolor historical spectacle Reap the Wild Wind was to have starred Gary Cooper, but Cooper's prior commitment to Goldwyn's Pride of the Yankees compelled DeMille to recast the leading role with John Wayne. The film, set in the mid-19th century, centers around Key West, Florida, where piracy reigns unchecked. Wayne plays the captain of a salvage business, working on behalf of Raymond Massey to rescue valuables from the merchant ships wrecked by pirates. During one expedition, Wayne is rescued from drowning by Paulette Goddard, the hoydenish manager of a rival salvage firm. Goddard arranges for Wayne to go to work for her boss, Ray Milland, and a romantic rivalry ensues. Later on, Goddard's cousin Susan Hayward is lost at sea when her ship is attacked by pirates. Wayne is accused of engineering the wreck, thanks to the duplicity of Massey, the real brains of the pirate operation. Wayne and Milland both don deep-sea diving gear and swim to the bottom in search of evidence. When Milland is attacked by an octopus, Wayne saves his rival's life at the expense of his own. Massey is exposed, and Milland wins Goddard. Essentially a standard maritime meller, Reap the Wild Wind takes on the veneer of importance thanks to DeMille's epic treatment of the material. Though competition is fierce, Ray Milland steals the show with a truly offbeat characterization (he even gets to indulge in a little ventriloquism!) ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Winfield Sheehan, former head of Fox studios, owned the only Austrian Lippizan horses in the U.S. In 1940, MGM bought the rights to the Felix Salten novel Florian, all about the Lippanzers. When the film was made, the producer was Winfield Sheehan. Coincidence? We don't think so. At any rate, the story, set in the 1880s, tells of how hero (Robert Young) and heroine (Helen Gilbert) are brought together through their love of horses. Just so we don't forget that Florian is set in Austria, Reginald Owen shows up as emperor Franz Josef. For another filmic treatment of the fabulous Lippanzer show horses, we refer you to Disney's The Miracle of the White Stallions (63). ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

In their last film for Hal Roach, Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy play employees at the Sharp and Pierce Horn Factory, where the workers tend to go beserk at a rate of one per hour. Driven crazy by the cacophonous G-minor horn, poor Ollie begins to tear the factory apart, screaming "Horns to the left of me! Horns to the right of me! Horns, horns, HORNS!" Sent home to recuperate from his nervous breakdown, Ollie is told by his doctor (James Finlayson) that he is suffering from Hornophobia: "In fact, you're on the verge of Hornomania." Advised to take a restful ocean voyage, Ollie nixes the idea, noting that he hates the high sea. Stan suggests that the two of them rent a small boat and keep it tied up on the dock, so that Ollie can get all the fresh sea air he wants without ever leaving port. Alas, the boys' tiny boat is accidentally set adrift, with Stan, Ollie and escaped killer Nick Grainger (Rychard Cramer) on board. Ordered to prepare breakfast for the ill-tempered Nick, the boys hope to subdue their captor by making him a "synthetic meal": String for spaghetti, soap for cheese, sponge for meatball, lampwick for bacon, and so on. Unfortunately, Nick catches on to their scheme and forces Stan and Ollie to eat the ersatz meal themselves. The boys are finally saved from Nick's wrath when Stan remembers that the sound of trombone will transform Ollie into a fighting demon, but don't count on a completely happy ending when Laurel & Hardy are involved. Cowritten by former comedy great Harry Langdon, Saps at Sea looks more like two or three 2-reelers strung together than a coherent feature film; still, it contains some great gags, most of them taking place in Ollie's apartment, where the plumbing and electrical appliances have been bollixed up by cross-eyed janitor Ben Turpin. Though hardly a classic, Saps at Sea earned Laurel & Hardy some of their best-ever reviews, and would turn out to be their last totally worthwhile feature film. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

A singing waiter with a wonderful operatic voice finds himself in the squared circle facing heavyweight boxers after he gets involved with crooked fight promoters who want him to both win the world heavyweight championship and attract more female fans with his post bout crooning. The promoters gull the waiter into his bizarre gig with the bogus promise that boxing will improve his singing. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

This film should have been a press agent's dream: Hollywood's two greatest "big mouths," Joe E. Brown and Martha Raye, together in the same picture. Brown and Raye play a show business couple who inherit a near-bankrupt college. They decide to build up the school's scraggly football team in hopes of improving alumni funding; somewhere along the line it is agreed to grant one thousand dollars for every touchdown scored, hence the title. Slapstick opportunities abound, and with the two stars at the helm, the film should have been far funnier than it is. But thanks to uninspired direction and a threadbare budget, $1000 a Touchdown was a disappointment for fans of both Martha Raye and Joe E. Brown. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

20th Century-Fox's Meet the Girls was the vanguard of an intended series about the misadventures of two trouble-prone chorus girls. June Lang and Lynn Bari star as Judy Davis and Terry Wilson, who after losing their jobs in a Honolulu nightclub also manage to misplace their ticket money for the boat trip home. Stowing away on a San Francisco-bound liner, Judy and Terry get mixed up with a comic-opera gigolo (Erik Rhodes), a hypochondriac (Gene Lockhart) and a mysterious jewel thief. As if that weren't enough, our heroines must fend off the friendly advances of well-dressed boozer Mr. Brady (played by perennial movie souse Jack Norton). A minor success, Meet the Girls spawned a sequel, Pardon Our Nerve (1939), but no series materialized. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Paramount's answer to Mutiny on the Bounty (1935) also involved mutiny and romance on the high seas. Gary Cooper stars as Nuggin Taylor, first mate on a slave ship in 1842. Ironically, Nuggin is an abolitionist. When a mutiny overthrows the ship's skipper and leaves him in charge, he frees his cargo. Back in England, charges against Nuggin and his fellow shipmate Powdah (George Raft) are dropped. Nuggin is approached by British intelligence agents and asked to embark on a secret information-gathering mission that could end the slave trade. Nuggin agrees and Powdah accompanies him on a ship bound for America, where both men fall in love, Nuggin with Margaret (Frances Dee) and Powdah with Babsie (Olympa Bradna). However, their adventures are far from over. ~ Karl Williams, All Movie Guide

Working on the theory that the only thing funnier than Laurel and Hardy is two sets of Laurel and Hardys, Our Relations milks its central mistaken-identity situation for all it's worth. Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy are two solid citizens, happily married and highly respected in their community. One morning, Hardy receives a letter from his mother, containing an old photo of himself and Laurel with their twin brothers, Alf Laurel and Bert Hardy. Mamma also reveals that Alf and Bert turned out to be "bad lads" and ran off to sea, and that reportedly they'd been hanged for taking part in a mutiny. "Isn't that calamitous!" remarks Hardy, who conspires with Laurel to hide the facts about their no-good brothers from their wives. Meanwhile, in another part of town, the S.S. Periwinkle pulls into port. Among the crew members are the selfsame Alf and Bert, who have decided to entrust their pal Fin (James Finlayson) with their month's salary. Fin has promised to invest the dough so that the boys will become millionaires "before you can say Jack Robinson". Alf and Bert are then summoned to the cabin of their captain (Sidney Toler), who orders them to pick up a valuable package for him, then meet him later at Denker's Beer Garden. While waiting for the captain at Denker's, Alf and Bert are captivated by a pair of waterfront floozies, Alice (Iris Adrian) and Lily (Lona Andre). Talked into buying the girls a huge meal for which they haven't the necessary funds, Alf and Bert decide to go back to Fin and reclaim their money, leaving the contents of the captain's package-a valuable pearl ring-with tough waiter Joe Groagan (Alan Hale) as security. Later, Laurel and Hardy take their wives Betty (Betty Healy) and Daphne (Daphne Pollard) to lunch-and, inevitably, they end up at Denker's Beer Garden, where the equally inevitable mix-ups begin to occur. Things snowball from bad to worse before both sets of twins, an angry captain, a disgruntled Fin, the wives, the floozies, a genial drunk (Arthur Housman) and a brace of smooth gangsters (Ralf Harolde and Noel Madison) all converge at the upscale Pirate Club. Several slapstick complications later, Laurel and Hardy are captured by the gangsters, who threaten to dump the boys in the river with their feet encased in cement if they don't cough up the pearl ring. Alf and Bert come to the rescue, and all is well, at least until the film's boffo punchline. Based on W.W. Jacobs' short story The Money Box, Our Relations is perhaps the most plot-heavy of Laurel and Hardy's features for Hal Roach Studios. It is also one of their funniest, as well as their most lavishly produced. The film was officially listed as "A Stan Laurel Production"-as if Laurel hadn't been the prime creative force behind all of the team's previous films. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

No relation to the 1951 Cary Grant film of the same name, People Will Talk was another of Paramount's moneymaking comedies starring Charles Ruggles and Mary Boland. This time the middle-aged pair try to patch up the marriage of their daughter (Leila Hyams) and son-in-law (Dean Jagger, with hair). They do this to quell the local gossip mongers, who have been set abuzz by the fact that daughter has come home alone. Ruggles and Boland stage a fake fight, hoping to shame their daughter into returning to her husband--and, as expected, the phony quarrel turns into the genuine article. People Will Talk was coscripted by Broadwayite Herbert Fields, the son of famed 1890s comedian Lew Fields and brother of lyricist Dorothy Fields. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

It's the wild and woolly waterfront world of San Francisco in the late 1800s in this rambling tale of an outrageous nightclub owner (Edward G. Robinson) and his efforts at wooing lovely Mary Rutledge (Miriam Hopkins), a lovely Eastern lass left to her own devices in the rowdy port city. The innocent babe loses that innocence when she becomes a kept lady, running the roulette wheel in Robinson's nightclub. The plot matures when Mary falls in love with an honest and upright gold miner. When the lovers are discovered during a fateful tryst, they flee the evil Robinson, hoping to escape as stowaways aboard a departing ship. Robinson is magnificent in this ruffian role. This action-filled adventure is suitable for the whole family. ~ All Movie Guide

The first of MGM's phenomenally profitable Jeanette MacDonald-Nelson Eddy musicals, Naughty Marietta takes several beneficial liberties with the libretto of the original Victor Herbert operetta. MacDonald plays an 18th-century French princess who escapes an arranged marriage by posing as a "cake girl," a mail-order bride sent to the New World to marry a colonist. En route, MacDonald and the other brides are captured by pirates, but are rescued by mercenary Eddy and his roistering companions. To avoid marrying some lowly farmer or frontiersman, simon-pure MacDonald intimates that she is a woman with a "history," which makes her attractive to the glitterati of old New Orleans. Only Eddy sees through MacDonald's feigned "naughtiness," and in the end claims her for his own. The most memorable of the Herbert songs retained for the film version of Naughty Marietta was "Ah, Sweet Mystery of Life", which remained one of Jeanette MacDonald's signature tunes ever afterward. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide