Linnea Quigley Movies

In this bawdy musical, a prince is pressured to procreate in order to keep his kingdom going. Unfortunately, he is a picky fellow and refuses to do his royal duty with anyone but the exquisite, enigmatic "Princess Beauty," whose picture hangs in the royal hall. He enlists the aid of a learned friend to help him make it to Fairyland to find her. Many erotic adventures ensue. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

This standard formula slasher-thriller involves an equal-opportunity psycho busily pitchforking both male and female members of a high-school track team. The killer's motivation is supposedly linked to a similar murder which occurred 40 years ago at an ill-fated graduation dance. This tedious time-waster scores a few brownie points by way of creative casting (be sure to catch Vanna White as one of the toothsome victims), but that's about it. Slasher movie completists may note the plot's strong resemblance to that of The Prowler, a lesser-known but far more stylish film released the same year. Future scream-queen-in-training Linnea Quigley appears in a small doomed-teen role. ~ Cavett Binion, All Movie Guide

Don't Go Near the Park begins in a cave 12,000 years ago, where an old crone with phony rubber hands curses her sinful children, Gar and Tre (Crackers Phinn, Barbara Monker). They will age ten years for every year of life and never die. To appear youthful, they must kill people by ripping their stomachs open and eating their guts. To end the curse, Gar must marry a woman and produce a virgin girl who will be sacrificed at age 16. The next segment follows Gar (now named Mark) as he hypnotizes his landlady (a young Linnea Quigley) into bearing him a child, Bondi. On her 16th birthday, Bondi is upset by her parents' fighting and runs away to Griffith Park, blowing up a van full of rapists along the way. In the park, supposedly cursed by the "demons of Los Feliz," Bondi is taken in by Patty, who is actually Tre in disguise. Patty lives in an abandoned ranch house with two other runaways. Cowboy (Chris Riley) is a handsome teen who shows Bondi his child-abuse scars and falls in love with her, while Nick is a sassy eight-year-old played by Voyager from the Unknown's Meeno Peluce, first seen as he tries to fondle Bondi in her sleep. Aldo Ray plays a writer named Taft who tells Nick about the park's curse, leading the three kids to try an escape. They end up in a corpse-filled cave, where Mark tries to rape Bondi until Patty hits him on the head with a rock. The witchy siblings shoot lasers out of their eyes at each other, then Bondi turns into their mother and causes all the corpses to come alive, devouring them. Reverting to her normal form, Bondi helps Nick and Cowboy escape the cave, but rips Nick's stomach open on a playground slide in a predictable "shock ending." Director Lawrence D. Foldes and co-screenwriter Linwood Chase appear as two of the van rapists, and their fiery demise at least provides some measure of revenge for the audience. ~ Robert Firsching, All Movie Guide

In this fourth Cheech and Chong adventure, the duo's view of humor, drugs, and sex are let loose in Amsterdam. Still Smokin' finds the two comedians arriving in the Netherlandish capital to go the city's first film festival, where they are mistaken for Dolly Parton and Burt Reynolds -- a sure sign that the festival and this film are doomed. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

Heather (Linnea Quigley), the deaf-mute sister of Brenda (Linda Blair) is gang-raped in a drawn-out, violent scene at the beginning of this routine vengeance movie, a scene that provides the motivation for Brenda's rampage through the rest of the film. Dressed in a special outfit that bares enough skin to suit the standards of this genre and armed with a crossbow, Brenda goes after the young punks in the "Scars" gang who raped her sister -- with predictably gory results. Surrounding this miniature Charles Bronson is a society burdened with parodies of "good" people: the school principal who is only superficially tough, and the upper-class teens whose thought processes were arrested shortly after kindergarten. Stereotypical and transparent, this teen movie is interesting because it does promote a woman in a "hero" role, but the subject matter and violence will not appeal to everyone. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

In spite of some interesting names attached to this low-budget, embarrassing horror film (Rafael Buñuel, son of acclaimed Luis Buñuel is the co-writer and co-producer), the result is anemic. At the core of the story, seven athletes in training for the Olympics at the Falcon Academy of Athletics in Massachusetts are violently slain by a killer with a wicked javelin toss. Most of the women in the film are portrayed as lesbians (apparently a straight woman can do no more than wield a wicked crochet hook), or their gender is indeterminate because of the drugs they imbibe -- a side issue in the film. Clichéd, predictable, and lacking in suspense, Fatal Games was never released theatrically. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

This parody of horror movies centers upon an impish little genie who was accidentally released from its bowling-trophy home by a lively group of curvaceous coeds after they end up trapped in a shopping mall. To stop the mischievous demon, the girls team up with a few geeky nerds. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

The last thing that seductive Lu the nightclub singer expected when the pirates abducted her was to be taken to an ancient Central American temple and worshiped by its people as a moon goddess. Actually she never expected to be abducted by pirates either. All she really expected was to entertain people living in the jungle. This adventure chronicles her exploits as the beloved moon goddess. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

In this horror sequel, the younger brother of the murderer in the previous film takes up his sibling's unfinished business. Dressed up as Santa Claus, the young man goes on a killing spree, murdering the innocent townsfolk in a variety of gory and gruesome ways. ~ Iotis Erlewine, All Movie Guide

A group of teens plan a Halloween party at an abandoned funeral parlor in this well-crafted horror film. The home is rumored to be haunted after the owner slaughtered his family and killed himself years before. The teens plan on scaring their classmates, unaware that demons from hell are released for a night of terror for bad behavior. One by one, the teens fall victim to the evil that dwells within the parlor. The audience is left guessing who, if anyone, will be alive the following morning. This fright feature is rife with references to other teen slasher flicks. ~ Dan Pavlides, All Movie Guide

This tale wavers on the fine line between erotic comedy and soft-core porn with a definite leaning toward the latter as it tells the story of female police cadets training to join the Hollywood vice squad. During training, the toothsome rookies are assigned to infiltrate a kiddy porn operation. Next they must go undercover and join a prostitution ring. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

In this tongue-in-cheek (and quite a few cheeks are shown) parody of the workout video craze, scream queen Linnea Quigley leads the audience through some healthy aerobic exercises -- while dressed in leather and chains. Later, at a slumber party, she leads her equally scantily dressed girlfriends in even more workouts while being watched by a homicidal party crasher. Later, on a jog through the neighborhood, she is pursued home by a gang of zombies -- whom she proceeds to lead through an aerobics class (but not without the obligatory shower scene!). All the while, clips from her numerous low-budget horror films are shown. ~ Brian Gusse, All Movie Guide