Patrick Miller Movies

In this throwback monster movie from producer Dean Devlin (Independence Day, Godzilla), David Arquette plays the son of a deceased mine owner, returning home to the economically depressed hamlet of Prosperity, AZ, after a long absence. His arrival coincides with a toxic waste accident in the local water supply, the result of a barrel jostled loose from the back of a passing truck. Unfortunately, said water source abuts the region's least-popular attraction: an exotic spider farm. The farm's owner (Tom Noonan) becomes the first victim when the spiders, already possessed of keen predatory abilities, grow to the size of small automobiles. Laying in wait underground, they begin picking off the town's pet and ostrich population, and soon it's all the local sheriff (Kari Wuhrer) can do to raise the alarm before the siege begins. Eight Legged Freaks was produced under the working title "Arac Attack," but the politically conscious producers, concerned the title sounded too much like "Iraq Attack," went with Arquette's brainstorm as a safer alternative. ~ Derek Armstrong, All Movie Guide

The lonely wife of a struggling tobacco farmer succumbs to temptation and sleeps with a transient harvester in this drama set in Depression-ravaged North Carolina. The drifter offers her more excitement than the bored young mother has felt in years and it is no surprise that she and he begin plotting to murder her hard-working husband. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide

Writer-director Stephen King falls short in his debut at the helm with Maximum Overdrive, an absurd tale about a radiation storm that somehow animates machines across the world, causing them to turn on their makers. The film focuses on a group of survivors held captive at the Dixie Boy Diner by a group of bad-tempered semis. Led by Emilio Estevez, the diner-goers do their impression of Ten Little Indians, waiting their turn until each gets bumped off one by one. There are holes in the plot big enough for the semis to drive through; for example, why don't the trucks run over the diner at the start of the film rather than wait for ninety minutes? Maximum Overdrive's only distinction is that it is, without question, one of the worst films released in the '80s. ~ Jeremy Beday, All Movie Guide

In this youth comedy, Nicole (Margaret Currie) is a member of the Cherry Suicide rock band currently playing in Boston. She welcomes her sister Samantha (Katherine Harrison) on a short vacation visit. Martin (Garth McLean) falls for Samantha after he meets her and one thing leads to another. Soon the whole lot of them are heading south on a lark. During this "road trip" they meet all sorts of characters, such as a tent full of religious revivalists, and they are chased by some inept jewel thieves. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

This undistinguished murder muddle by director Michael Curtis involves an artist and his alcoholic psychologically disturbed wife -- who disappears one day. John Hamilton (Alan Ladd) has retreated to the New England countryside to pursue a potential career as an artist, but his wife Linda (Carolyn Jones) wants to go back to New York. She is observed as being both drunk and a little strange, while John is clearly the anchor in the relationship. When Linda disappears, John is immediately suspected of doing away with his troublesome wife, and so a net of suspicion and circumstantial evidence closes in ever-tightening circles around him. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide

From the folks who brought you I Was a Teenage Werewolf comes this relentlessly shlocky variation on the Frankenstein legend. Whit Bissell stars as Professor Frankenstein, descendant of you-know-who, who harbors a few radical theories about limb transplantation. Laughed at by students and colleagues alike, the good professor intends to prove the efficacy of his theories in his own lab at home--keeping an alligator as a "pet" to dispose of discarded body parts. When a carful of teenagers crashes near his home, Frankenstein and his assistant Carlton (Robert Burton) gather up the bodies and begin stitching up the fragments, adding a few chunks of flesh recovered from a convenient plane wreck. The result is a teenaged monster (Gary Conway) with a bad attitude. Already a bit off in the coop to begin with, Professor Frankenstein goes completely bonkers, using the monster to dispose of such awkward witnesses as the professor's fiancee Margaret (Phyllis Coates). The film's final burst of violence is filmed in color, for no discernable reason. If for nothing else, I Was a Teenage Frankenstein would be memorable for Professor F's deathless line to his sullen creation: "Answer me! You have a civil tongue in your head! I know, I sewed it in there!" ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Tight Spot is based on Leonard Kantor's novel Dead Pigeon, which in turn was obviously inspired by Virginia Hill's appearance before the Kefauver Committee. Ginger Rogers plays hard-boiled model Sherry Conley, who is serving a prison term for a crime she didn't commit. Sherry is offered her freedom -- and immunity -- by U.S. attorney Lloyd Hallett (Edward G. Robinson) if she'll agree to appear as a material witness in the trial of mobster Benjamin Costain (Lorne Greene). Unfortunately, Costain has a long reach, and is able to coerce Vince Striker (Brian Keith), the detective assigned to guard Sherry, to allow Costain's hired guns to invade the hotel room where Sherry is being hidden. The star witness is surly and uncooperative, but she finally decides to testify when her escort, policewoman Willoughby (Katherine Anderson), is murdered by Costain's goons. But Striker is still around and about, still determined to do Costain's bidding. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Auto mechanic and wannabe race-car driver Eddie Shannon (Mickey Rooney) allows himself to be led perilously astray in Drive a Crooked Road. Responding to the come-hither looks of sexy Barbara Mathews (Dianne Foster), Eddie is inveigled into participating in a bank heist. Things then go from bad to worse to awful for both Eddie and Barbara, victims of circumstance in a larger-scale scheme masterminded by hoodlums Steve Norris (Kevin McCarthy) and Harold Baker (Jack Kelly). Without ever justifying their actions, Drive a Crooked Road manages to engender plenty of audience sympathy for the hapless hero and heroine. The film was written by Blake Edwards and directed by Richard Quine, the same team responsible for such Mickey Rooney comic vehicles as All Ashore and Sound Off! ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide

Robert Francis is at the center of the story as Willis Keith, a newly-minted ensign assigned to the destroyer/minesweeper U.S.S. Caine during World War II. Soon after his arrival, the ship gets a new captain, Lt. Comdr. Philip Francis Queeg Humphrey Bogart, a tough, no-nonsense veteran officer who tries to turns the crew into proper sailors and the Caine into a tight ship, engendering resentment from some of the men and several of his officers. A veteran of difficult years of service for too long, Queeg has insecurities about himself, his command, and his career that begin to manifest themselves as spells of temper over small details that cause him to make mistakes. Lt.Keefer (Fred MacMurray), the glib-tongued communications officer, begins making suggestions to the ship's sincere but overburdened first officer, Lt. Steve Maryk (Van Johnson), that Queeg may have mental problems. Maryk initially rejects these suggestions, and tries to support the captain, but conditions deteriorate to the point where Maryk is forced to relieve Queeg of command, and is charged -- along with Keith, who supported him -- with mutiny. Enter Lt. Barney Greenwald (Jose Ferrer), a lawyer in civilian life, who reluctantly agrees to help them, mostly out of sympathy for the impossible predicament in which Maryk has found himself trapped. ~ Bruce Eder, All Movie Guide