Sean McClory Movies

Horror virtuoso John Carpenter hosts this goofy horror anthology, originally produced for Showtime as a gory stepchild of HBO's Tales from the Crypt series. Playing an emaciated, eye-rolling "coroner," John introduces the audience to a triptych of creepy vignettes in the EC horror-comics mode while paddling about in the guts of assorted cadavers and cracking jokes more gag-inducing than anything oozing on the slab. Two of the stories are directed by Carpenter himself: "The Gas Station" is a retread (pun intended) of Halloween-style scare tactics as a pretty gas-station attendant watches various oddballs pass by her window after hearing that an escaped killer is on the loose; "Hair" is a morbid, hilarious look at man's obsession with his own virility in which Stacy Keach turns to a bizarre hair-growth clinic (run by David Warner & Debbie Harry) which promises instant results, but at a horrific price. The third segment, directed by Tobe Hooper, involves a baseball player (Mark Hamill) who receives an eye transplant after a car accident and soon begins having optical flashbacks revealing (you guessed it) the identity and tendencies of the eye's former owner -- a serial killer. The second segment is by far the most entertaining, featuring a wonderfully neurotic performance by Keach, but the first and last chapters are too derivative to offer much for the discriminating horror buff, although the same fans will enjoy several cute cameos from other genre directors, including Wes Craven, Sam Raimi and Roger Corman. ~ Cavett Binion, Rovi

The final film of legendary director John Huston was based on the closing story of James Joyce's Dubliners. Anjelica Huston is top-billed as Gretta Conroy, the niece by marriage of turn-of-century Irish spinsters Kate Morkan (Helena Carroll) and Julia Morkan (Cathleen Delany). At the home of these two curious ladies, Gretta is prodded into remembering her long-dead lover. She tearfully reveals to her husband (Donal McCann) that the deceased boy may well have died on her behalf. Her tale of woe bespeaks the sentiment shared by James Joyce: no matter how long in their graves, the dead will always influence the living. Adding to the film's elegiac quality, it stars Huston's daughter Anjelica and was co-written with his son Tony Huston. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

This episode reunites Jessica (Angela Lansbury) with her former sweetheart David Everett (Leslie Nielsen), a man of great charm--and a great capacity for causing trouble. This time, Everett has spearheaded a search for buried treasure off the coast of Cabot Cove. When one of the divers is murdered, Jessica agrees to investigate in hopes of clearing Everett's name, only to discover that, as usual, her ex-lover has not been entirely honest and above-board with her (nor anyone else, for that matter!) ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

When a long-range recon mission in a new, computer-equipped Viper goes awry, Starbuck (Dirk Benedict) is captured and shipped off to a forgotten prison planet. Starbuck's fellow inmates are all descendants of the planet's original criminal population, condemned to a lifetime of blind obedience to unknown superiors, and forced to manufacture ambrosia for a fleet that has long ceased to exist. It is up to Starbuck to convince these hopeless souls to revolt against their centuries-old bondage. "The Long Patrol" was later combined with the Battlestar Galactica episode "Take the Celestra" and reissued as the two-hour "TV movie" Space Casanova. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

While visiting a train station with their families, Ingalls sisters Mary (Melissa Sue Anderson) and Laura (Melissa Gilbert) and the Edwards' adopted son, Carl (Brian Part), sneak into an empty caboose. Carl accidentally discouples the car from the rest of the train, thereby propelling himself and the girls on a treacherous, 30-mile downhill ride. As the caboose races toward certain destruction, Charles (Michael Landon) desperately tries to rescue the kids. This episode was filmed in the Gold Rush Country of California. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

Anne Meara stars as Denver lawyer Kate McShane in this pilot film for the weekly CBS series of the same name. With the help of her two favorite "leg men" -- her ex-cop father, Pat (Sean McClory), and her Jesuit priest-law professor brother, Ed (Randy Quaid) -- Kate not only defends accused murderers, but also endeavors to solve the cases herself without the help of the authorities. Kate is determined to reduce the charge against her wealthy client, Charlotte Randall Chase (Christine Belford), from murder to manslaughter -- even if means putting the victim "on trial" himself. Cal Bellini co-stars as Kate's cynical partner, Angelo Romero. Another of the many "ethnic detective" TV projects of the era (Kate is Irish, in case there is any doubt), the Kate McShane pilot first aired on April 11, 1975. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

James Stewart and Dean Martin are atypically cast as outlaws in Bandolero! The film begins as Dee Bishop (Martin) and his gang are about to be hanged. The Scripture-spouting executioner turns out to be Dee's brother Mace (Stewart), who helps the desperadoes escape. They are pursued by a sheriff (George Kennedy), whose lady friend (Raquel Welch) has the hots for Dee. The brothers try to go straight, but before they can make up their mind they find themselves surrounded by Mexican bandidos and are forced to team up with the sheriff to fight them off. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

Adapted from the book and play of the same name, The Happiest Millionaire is the (mostly) true story of eccentric Philadelphia millionaire Anthony J. Drexel Biddle (Fred MacMurray). The Biddle mansion is the gathering place for a pugilistic boxing class, pet alligators and would-be opera singers. Cordelia Biddle (Lesley Ann Warren), the daughter of Anthony and his wife (Greer Garson), wants to marry wealthy and handsome Angie Duke (John Davidson), but Angie's parents are shocked by the Biddles' freewheeling lifestyle. Thanks in part to the ebullient intervention of John Lawless (Tommy Steele), the Biddles' butler, all misunderstandings are eventually swept away. Like Disney's previous Mary Poppins, The Happiest Millionaire is decked out with a vibrant musical score by Richard and Robert Sherman, but the magic is somehow lacking this time around. This was the last live-action film to personally supervised by Walt Disney; released several months after Disney's death, the film was made available in 141-minute and 164-minute versions. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

A cosmic time warp takes Will (Billy Mumy back to Glamis Castle in 19th century Scotland. It so happens that the castle houses a ghost named McPherson (Sean McClory) and a monster named Angus (Dawson Palmer), both of whom remain imprisoned on earth until McPherson can fulfill a vendetta. Seeing the opportunity to return to earth, Dr. Smith (Jonathan Harris) follows Will into the castle--unaware that McPherson is foresworn to kill Smith, whose ancestors were responsible for the angry ghost's current plight! ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

In this Alaskan adventure, kindly forest ranger Adam West endeavors to civilize a beautiful young girl who was raised by wolves after she saves him from a bear trap. Obstructing West's attempts are a greedy fellow who wants to sell her to a carnival. ~ Sandra Brennan, Rovi

Tim (Bill Bixby) plays host to his wealthy Irish great-uncle Seamus O'Hara (Sean McClory), who has never heard of "Uncle" Martin (Ray Walston) and is suspicious of his origins. Upon witnessing the Martian as he levitates, Seamus is convinced that he has the answer--Martin must be a leprechaun! Having thus "captured" Martin, Seamus demands that his wish to be reunited with his long-lost love Eileen McGinty (Virginia Gregg) be granted...immediately. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

John Ford's last western film, Cheyenne Autumn was allegedly produced to compensate for the hundreds of Native Americans who had bitten the dust in Ford's earlier films (that was the director's story, anyway). Set in 1887, the film recounts the defiant migration of 300 Cheyennes from their reservation in Oklahoma territory to their original home in Wyoming. They have done this at the behest of chiefs Little Wolf (Ricardo Montalban) and Dull Knife (Gilbert Roland), peaceful souls who have been driven to desperate measures because the US government has ignored their pleas for food and shelter. Since the Cheyennes' trek is in defiance of their treaty, Captain Thomas Archer (Richard Widmark), who agrees with the Indians in principle, reluctantly leads his troops in pursuit of the tribe. While there was never any intention to shed blood, the white press finds it politically expedient to distort the Cheyennes' action into a declaration of war. Thanks to the cruelties of such chauvinistic whites as Captain Oscar Wessels (Karl Malden), the Cheyennes are forced to defend themselves--and whenever Indians take arms against whites in the 1880s, it's usually misrepresented as a massacre. Only the intervention of US secretary of the interior Carl Schurz (Edward G. Robinson) prevents the hostilities from erupting into wholesale bloodshed. Based on a novel by Mari Sandoz, Cheyenne Autumn is a cinematic elegy--not only for the beleaguered Cheyennes, but for John Ford's fifty years in pictures. It is weakest when arbitrarily throwing in a wearisome romance between Richard Widmark and pacifistic schoolmarm Carroll Baker, who out of sympathy for the Indians has joined them in their 1500-mile westward journey. When the Warner Bros. people decided that the film ran too long, they chopped out the wholly unnecessary but very funny episode involving a poker-obsessed Wyatt Earp (James Stewart). Contrary to popular belief, this episode was included in the earliest non-roadshow prints of Cheyenne Autumn; the scene was excised only when the film went into its second and third runs in 1966 (it has since been restored). ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi

Dickie Durham (Liam Sullivan), proverbial black sheep of his wealthy family, returns home after nineteen years at sea and puts the bite on his rich brother Russell (Ford Rainey). Dickie wants enough money to open a pub in Australia--and if he doesn't get it, he will reveal that he is the actual father of Russell's "daughter" Paula (Barbara Parkins). Later on, Dickie is killed in a waterfront brawl, and his shipmate "Lord Harry" Fothergill (Sean McClory) is charged with the crime. Lawyer Perry Mason must prove that, despite his disreptuable demeanor, Harry is the soul of honesty and wouldn't harm a fly--even though there's a $100,000 inheritance that could be considered a motive for the murder. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi