Tad Horino Movies
Writer, director, and star Steve Oedekerk lampoons the martial arts genre with this action spoof that digitally mixes new scenes with poorly dubbed footage from the vintage 1976 film Savage Killers. Oedekerk stars as "the Chosen One," a kung-fu prodigy even from the womb, who grows up to seek vengeance on the evil, legendary "Master Pain" (aka Betty), who murdered his parents. Along the way, he is aided in his quest by the kindly, wizened Master Tang as well as Whoa (Jennifer Tung), a karate queen with a cleavage problem. The Chosen One is also called upon to employ his unique fighting styles, including the "gopher," and faces not only Master Pain, but a gay henchman and the lethal lactation of a deadly, karate-chopping cow. Originally entitled "The Dubbed Action Movie," this broad parody saw its release delayed several times, finally reaching theaters two years after it was shot. Kung Pow! Enter the Fist co-stars Tad Horino and Philip Tan. ~ Karl Williams, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Steve Oedekerk, Lung Fei, (more)
- 1994
This Austrian comedy, with an Austrian and Czech cast, looks at international business in East Europe. Eva is a hotel bar dancer. When the eighty-something Japanese businessman Harada asks her to marry him and front a business deal that would allow him to buy property in Prague, Eva readily agrees. Though the elderly Harada has an exuberant sex drive, his body cannot stand the strain and he dies. Eva is left unwed and broke. She then tries to con Christian, a hunky Austrian, into marrying her. Christian has come to Prague to buy the same property. His lover/business partner is Liane. When he returns to Vienna, Eva follows him and becomes involved in a threesome. A bidding war ensues after Harada's partners show up with Eva's poor ex-husband. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Michaela Kuklova, Gregor Bloeb, (more)
Also known as Surf Warriors, this film is a low-budget, offbeat comedy aimed at the teen audience. Two young surfer dudes from southern California, Johnny (Ernie Reyes, Jr.) and Adam (Nicolas Cowen), have their lives changed when they discover that they are heirs to the crown of Patu San, an obscure South Pacific island nation. The country's throne has been taken over by an incompetent, evil warlord, Colonel Chi (Leslie Nielsen). As the two surfer heroes travel to Patu San to regain the throne, Colonel Chi sends mercenaries to stop them. Johnny and Adam find that they have been given magical powers to help them in their quest -- one of them becomes instantly skilled at kung fu, and the other has psychic powers. Rap music artist Tone Loc plays one of Colonel Chi's henchmen, Lieutenant Spence. Martial arts sequences dominate the fighting scenes, which evoke the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles craze of the era. ~ Michael Betzold, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Ernie Reyes, Jr., Rob Schneider, (more)
- 1993
- PG
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This third film in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles series finds the half-shelled ninjas traveling back in time to 17th-century Japan in order to save April O'Neil (Paige Turco). Once there, they also use their skills to help a rebel army battle an evil leader. ~ Judd Blaise, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Elias Koteas, Paige Turco, (more)
Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey find the two obtuse pals battling The Grim Reaper, God, robots, great philosophical questions, and girls -- although not necessarily in that order. In this loose parody of the Terminator movies, directed by Peter Hewitt, the ultimate has happened -- at Bill and Ted University of the future, for many years now the people of the world have been "excellent to each other." But fed-up with Bill and Ted's peaceful world and even more fed up with heavy metal, the evil De Nomolos (Joss Ackland) decides to do something about it. De Nomolos creates a cyborg Bill and Ted, who travel back in time to kill the original Bill and Ted, win the Battle of the Bands and pave the way for the hellish reign of De Nomolos. In the past of 1990, Bill (Alex Winter) and Ted (Keanu Reeves) are immediately dispatched by the time-traveling cyborgs. And while the cyborgs Bill and Ted make time with the real Bill and Ted's girls (Sarah Trigger and Annette Azcuy) and prepare to take the real Bill and Ted's place in the Battle of the Bands, Bill and Ted are forced to deal with Hell ("Just like an Iron Maiden album cover"), the Grim Reaper (William Sadler), and God himself. When Bill and Ted are asked the secret of the universe, they get it right and as a reward a pair of Martians construct a set of "good" Bill and Ted robots to go head-to-head with the "bad" Bill and Ted robots at the Battle of the Bands. ~ Paul Brenner, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter, (more)
One of the few American films to deal with the tragic story of the internment of Asian-Americans during World War II, Come See the Paradise opens in the late 1930s, as Jack McGurn (Dennis Quaid) is working as a union organizer in New York City. Jack finds himself on the wrong side of the law after he gets involved in an ill-advised bombing of a scab shop, and he flees to Los Angeles, where Hiroshi Kawamura (Sab Shimono) gives him a job as a projectionist in L.A.'s Little Tokyo. Jack soon meets Hiroshi's beautiful daughter Lily (Tamlyn Tomita) and it's love at first sight. Jack and Lily decide to get married, but Hiroshi opposes the match and California law prevents mixed-race couples from obtaining a marriage license. Jack and Lily move to Seattle, where they are wed and soon have a daughter. Jack, however, begins working with the union again, which puts a strain on their marriage; Lily takes their child and returns to Los Angeles. But before long the United States enters World War II, and the Kawamura family is sent (along with all other Americans of Japanese descent living in California) to an internment camp, as it is believed they will become traitors against America if left to their own devices. Jack, ironically, is drafted into the Army and soon goes AWOL to return to California, where he tries to find his wife in the camps. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Dennis Quaid, Tamlyn Tomita, (more)
Director Andrei Konchalovsky comes a cropper with this mawkish road movie starring Whoopi Goldberg and James Belushi. Goldberg plays Edwina, an escaped mental patient with a brain tumor and only a month to live. Belushi is Homer, a retarded man abandoned by his parents when he was a child after a smack with a baseball bat rendered him an idiot. The two team-up when Homer takes off to Oregon to visit his parents and catch up on old times. Edwina agrees to drive him there to recover the $87 that Homer has stolen from her. As they drive down the American roadways, they bond, and Edwina is granted the shining love of Homer as she lapses into a coma. ~ Paul Brenner, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- James Belushi, Whoopi Goldberg, (more)
- 1986
Yet another crisis hits the courtroom when New York City is rocked by a freak earthquake. Among those suffering is prosecutor Dan Fielding (John Larroquette), who ends up trapped in an elevator with abrasive court matron Roz Russell (Marsha Warfield)--and a pair of very large, very hungry sumo wrestlers. Meanwhile, Harry (Harry Anderson) has his hands full with a couple of precociously obnoxious adolescents. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1986
- PG
A touch of comic relief adds to this otherwise predictable sci-fi actioner about a mad scientist (Roy Dotrice) holed up in a remote jungle fortress in Mexico with his time-machine and robotic know-how. He plans on zapping himself back to the Roman Empire to reign as emperor in Caesar's stead thereby ruining a certain 20th-century pizza franchise. Standing in the way is a pilot who was saved from imminent extinction when the evil doctor patched him together with mechanical body parts. Once the crazed scientist decides to do away with his "Man-droid," the 'droid-human escapes and rounds up a gang of accomplices to head back up-river and do the scientist in. Patrick Reynolds plays Mandroid. (Reynolds is the heir to the R.J. Reynolds tobacco fortune who divested his stock and leads a national anti-smoking organization.) ~ Eleanor Mannikka, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Andrew Prine, Denise Crosby, (more)
With 1985's Pacific Inferno action star Jim Brown made a triumphant return to movies. Or did he? If you read the copyright date carefully, you'll discover that this US-Philippine coproduction was actually shot in 1977. The plot has us believe that General Douglas MacArthur ordered that $16 million in silver be sent to the bottom of Manila Bay before the Philippines were overtaken by the Japanese in 1942. Navy divers Brown and Ric Van Nutter are among several POWs ordered to retrieve the money. Brown is all for escaping, but the duplicitous Van Nutter plans to abscond with the booty. Thus, Brown is alone in his efforts to round up local guerillas to help his fellow divers get away. Among the resistance fighters is buxom Wilma Reading, whose role consists of falling out of her blouse at the slightest provocation. Less attractive is "special guest star" Richard Jaeckel, who plays a soldier of fortune named Dealer. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Jim Brown, Richard Jaeckel, (more)
Brigitte Nielsen appears as warrior woman Sonja, who unites with a couple of other gladiator types (including Arnold Schwarzenegger) to overthrow the evil queen Gedren (Sandahl Bergman) and avenge the deaths of Sonja's family. This story descends from the writings of Robert E. Howard (author of Conan). ~ All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Brigitte Nielsen, Arnold Schwarzenegger, (more)
Tom Hanks stars in this raunchy teen comedy from veteran screenwriters Pat Proft and Neil Israel, who had previously collaborated on the amusing sketch film Tunnelvision (1976) and the disappointing Americathon (1980). Bus-driver Rick Gasko (Hanks) is engaged to wealthy Debbie Thompson (Tawny Kitaen), much to the chagrin of her father (George Grizzard), who considers Rick a loser. To keep an eye on her future groom, Debbie and her friends dress as prostitutes to attend his bachelor party, which quickly turns into a bacchanal of smutty debauchery. Familiar faces in the cast include action stars Michael Dudikoff and Ji-Tu Cimbuka, pin-ups Monique Gabrielle and Rosanne Katon, and teen-movie regulars Adrian Zmed and Wendie Jo Sperber. It's an occasionally hilarious excursion into bad taste, although one which two-time Oscar winner Hanks would probably like to forget. ~ Robert Firsching, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Tom Hanks, Tawny Kitaen, (more)
- 1984
In this rather blatant "all-white" derivation of the Gene Wilder-Richard Pryor starrer Stir Crazy, Christopher Lemmon and Charles Rocket are cast as pair of dimwitted innocents who suddenly find themselves on the wrong side of the law. While promoting a zany get-rich-quick scheme, uptight suburbanite Eugene Griswold (Lemmon) and his eccentric inventor pal Stanley Flynn (Rocket) are hijacked by a pair of equally stupid jewel thieves. Wrongly accused and convicted of the heist, Eugene and Stanley get swept up in a prison break, spending the balance of the film on the lam and in disguise. Filmed in 1982 as the pilot for a unsold TV series, The Outlaws didn't see the light of day until ABC had to fill an unplugged 90-minute scheduling hole on July 9, 1984. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
Ted Kotcheff continues his First Blood fervor with Uncommon Valor. Gene Hackman stars as Cal Rhodes, a former Marine Colonel who has been getting the run-around for ten years from the government concerning the disappearance of his son and his buddies - all Marines who enlisted years prior and served in Vietnam. Rhodes' son was last seen in Laos, where he was fighting in the war and captured as a POW. When word gets back to Rhodes that the men may still be alive and held in prison camps, but the government still has the men listed as missing in action, Rhodes decides to take matters into his own hands. Contacting an old friend, oil baron MacGregor (Robert Stack), Rhodes is granted financial backing to form his own incursion force. He assembles a crack team of men, puts them through an intensive period of training. and heads back with them into the Laotian jungles to search for the MIAs. ~ Paul Brenner, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Gene Hackman, Robert Stack, (more)
This low-budget sci-fi parody pokes fun at such "space operas" as Star Wars and Alien as it chronicles the adventures of the starship Infinity where poor Captain Cornelius Butt finds himself playing "mommy" to a baby alien while handsome crewman Thor falls in love with the beautiful robot pilot Galaxina and tries to turn her into a real woman. The film is best known for being the last screen appearance of rising-starlet Dorothy Stratten, the beautiful 20-year-old Playboy model who was brutally murdered by her estranged husband shortly after this film premiered. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Stephen Macht, Dorothy Stratten, (more)
Go Tell the Spartans is set in Vietnam during that period in which American troops were euphemistically termed "advisors". Reluctantly dispensing much of that advice is veteran American major Asa Barker (Burt Lancaster). Though he knows what works and what doesn't on the battlefield, Barker is obliged to carry out the go-nowhere policies of the American military brass. His current objective is a woebegone, barely crucial outpost, which he must defend with a handful of green soldiers and end-of-tether Vietnamese militiamen. True to his predictions, the outpost is overwhelmed by the Vietcong, who have something to fight about and are ruthless in their tactics. Before the relief troops can arrive, virtually everyone is senselessly killed, including Barker. The only survivor is Corporal Stephen Courcey (Craig Wasson), a willing draftee whose initial idealism dies along with his comrades. Wendell Mayes adapted Go Tell the Spartans from the novel Incident at Muc Wa by Daniel Ford. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Burt Lancaster, Craig Wasson, (more)
- 1972
Summoning the aid of Chief Ironside (Raymond Burr) is a nervous young woman named Jane Spencer (Sian Barbara Allen), who is sure that her father's "accidental" death was actually murder. The only clue the Chief has to go on is a cryptic Japanese ideogram, which may also explain the mysterious contents of a stolen package. Meanwhile, Ironside's assistant Ed becomes attracted to the profoundly troubled Jane. This episode features a neat, menacing peformance by a pre-stardom William Devane. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1971
The killer of police officer Randy Keating (Roger Perry) is himself killed by Keating's partner Frank Carlson (David Carradine)--whereupon Carlson finds himself facing a murder charge. Inasmuch as he attended police academy with both Keating and Carlson, Sgt. Ed Brown (Don Galloway) takes a personal interest in the case. With the help of his boss Ironside (Raymond Burr), Ed slowly but surely figures out that Carlson has been framed--but by whom? ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1966
In this sci-fi spy thriller, a secret agent for Espionage, Inc., is assigned to stop the Dragon, a Chinese communist organization, from detonating a nuclear bomb in Los Angeles. ~ Sandra Brennan, All Movie Guide
