David Hasselhoff Movies

A pair of super-sized snakes have escaped from a top-secret research laboratory, destroying the European countryside and consuming everything in their path as the terror continues in this made-for-cable installment of the slithering Anaconda series. In a secret government compound deep underground, brilliant research scientist Amanda (Crystal Allen) studies a pair of enormous snakes for a series of experiments funded by wealthy recluse Murdoch (John Rhys-Davies). When Murdoch crosses the line, disaster strikes and his two most prized snakes quickly find their way to the surface. Hungry, angry, and with nothing to prevent them from consuming everything and everyone who happens to cross their paths, the two snakes terrorize the locals until ruthless mercenary Hammett (David Hasselhoff) appears determined to put them on the endangered species list. Now, Hammett will team with Amanda on a mission to stop the slaughter before the snakes reach the city. But one of the snakes is pregnant with an entire litter of slithering giants, a fact which could bump mankind one notch down on the food chain should the baby snakes manage to escape and reproduce. With time running out before the snakes reach the city and a new breed emerges, Hammett and Amanda attempt to put their differences aside long enough to dispose of these colossal serpents once and for all. ~ Jason Buchanan, All Movie Guide

A workaholic architect, frustrated in his job but determined to make a better life for his family, is bestowed with a powerful universal remote that allows him more control over his life than he ever knew possible in director Frank Coraci's high-concept fantasy comedy. On the surface, Michael Newman (Adam Sandler) seems to have it all, yet with all the demands forced upon him by his ungrateful boss (David Hasselhoff), Michael finds that setting aside time to spend with his loving wife, Donna (Kate Beckinsale), and two picture-perfect children, Ben (Joseph Castanon) and Samantha (Tatum McCann), has grown increasingly difficult. When a frustrating bout with the television remote leads the overworked husband and father to a nearby Bed, Bath & Beyond in search of a universal remote with the power to control all of his electronic devices, a curious peek into the back room leads Michael into the company of eccentric employee and talented inventor Morty (Christopher Walken). It seems that Morty has created a device that will not only allow Michael complete control over his television and stereo, but his entire life as well. As Michael discovers that the remarkable device has the power to muffle the barks of the family dog, zoom himself past an irritating quarrel with his wife, and even allow him to travel back and forth through time to different points in his life, the rush of being able to skip straight to the good parts in life soon leaves him feeling as if he's missing out on the total experience. Only when Michael begins to realize that the he has lost control of his life and the remote is now programming him does he finally learn that life is as much about the moments he'd rather forget as it is the moments he will always remember. ~ Jason Buchanan, All Movie Guide

America's leading titan of bad taste, John Waters, returns to X-rated territory (well, actually NC-17-rated territory, but you get the idea) for this wildly over-the-top comedy. Sylvia Stickles (Tracey Ullman) is a wife and mother living in Baltimore who, along with her husband Vaughn (Chris Isaak) and mother Big Ethel (Suzanne Shepherd), operates a local convenience store. One day, Sylvia receives a sharp blow to the head, which leaves her with a concussion. However, the concussion comes with an unexpected side effect -- Sylvia has suddenly become a sex addict, and is soon attended to by the perverse and lascivious sexual evangelist Ray-Ray (Johnny Knoxville). When it becomes evident that Vaughn can't keep up with her sensual appetites, Sylvia throws herself into the strange netherworld of Baltimore's community of erotic overachievers, which includes her daughter Caprice (Selma Blair), who is living a double life as über-buxom exotic entertainer Ursula Udders. A Dirty Shame also features supporting performances from Waters regulars Patricia Hearst, Mink Stole, Mary Vivian Pearce, Channing Wilroy, and Jean Hill. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide

Something nefarious is afloat in the depths of Bikini Bottom: King Neptune's crown has been stolen, and the prime suspect is Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob's boss at Mr. Krabs' Krabby Patties. Despite the overwhelming evidence against Mr. Krabs -- not to mention having been turned down for a long-awaited promotion at the restaurant -- SpongeBob (voice of Tom Kenny) refuses to believe that his boss is responsible and teams up with his best friend, Patrick (voice of Bill Fagerbakke), on a mission to Shell City, where he hopes he can exonerate Mr. Krabs and return the crown to its rightful owner. Of course, this is no easy task; once outside the safety of Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob is faced with the overwhelming dangers of the sea, not the least of which being a cyclops that many believe to be responsible for the deaths of countless other unfortunate sea-creatures who ventured outside county lines. Among those who lent their vocal chords to the film include Scarlett Johansson, Jeffrey Tambor, and Alec Baldwin. ~ Tracie Cooper, All Movie Guide

Former Prada model and Road Trip co-star D.J. Qualls makes a bid for leading man status in this nerd-makeover comedy. Qualls stars as Dizzy, a dorky but delinquent high school student who's determined to get expelled from his hellish high school -- but ends up landing in jail instead. There he meets the intimidating, street-smart Luther (Eddie Griffin), himself a former geek, who takes Dizzy under his wing to teach him the art of being cool. Soon Luther and his pals have broken Dizzy of his meek, maladroit ways, and Dizzy is ready to start a new life at a new high school under a new name: Gil Harris. When Gil arrives at East Highland High -- his former inmate reputation known to all -- he quickly ingratiates himself with the cool kids and lays to waste any jocks who stand in his way. He even manages to date the school's most coveted girl, Danielle (Eliza Dushku). But when a face from his past shows up, it seems that his facade as the big man on campus may be about to crumble. The New Guy also stars Zooey Deschanel and Lyle Lovett, and features cameos from rockers Henry Rollins, Gene Simmons, and Tommy Lee. ~ Michael Hastings, All Movie Guide

While President Bartlet (Martin Sheen) is in Hollywood for a fundraiser hosted by politically active homosexual movie mogul Ted Marcus (Bob Balaban), Leo (John Spencer) is back in Washington politicking Vice President Hoynes (Tim Matheson) to vote the White House's position on an important tax bill that is currently in a 50-50 tie on the floor of the Senate. Meanwhile in L.A., Josh (Bradley Whitford) happily learns that political strategist Joey Lucas (Marlee Matlin) is staying in the same hotel as he is, and Bartlet meets his daughter Zoey's (Elisabeth Moss) new Secret Service bodyguard, Gina Toscano (Jorja Fox). ~ Perry Seibert, All Movie Guide

What would you do if an attractive stranger asked you do go to bed with them? In this steamy thriller, David Hasselhoff plays a business executive who is killing time at an airport cocktail lounge waiting for a flight when he's approached by a beautiful woman (Yvonne Scio) who wants him to go away with her. Throwing caution to the wind, he agrees, but after he's seduced by the mysterious stranger, he discovers he's put himself into a perilous situation when he finds out she's married -- and her husband (Gregg Henry) has deadly plans for him. Layover also features Sherri Alexander and Tom Wright. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide

Craig Ferguson, best known to American audiences as Mr. Wick, the conniving boss who loves to fire people on The Drew Carey Show, co-wrote and starred in this mock-documentary about Crawford Mackenzie, Scotland's leading hairdresser. When Crawford receives an invitation to Los Angeles for the World Freestyle Hairstyling Championships, he eagerly hops the first flight to America, with a camera crew in tow to record his triumphant debut in the States. Once he arrives, he learns that he was invited to attend and observe but not to compete. Crawford is at first dejected, but he refuses to take the humiliation lying down; one way or another, Crawford is determined to show off his talents for the greater glory of Scottish hair styling. The supporting cast includes Mary McCormack, Sara Gilbert, Larry Miller, and Charles Napier; director Kevin Allen previously helmed the offbeat Scottish comedy Twin Town. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide