David Mattey Movies

Reminiscent of Kindergarten Cop, with a dash of Spy Kids, The Spy Next Door blends together an entertaining mixture of family fun and martial-arts comedy styling to form a familiar story that once again reminds us that even hardened action heroes have a soft side. Jackie Chan stars as Bob Ho, an international spy on loan to the CIA who gives up his job in hopes of leading a so-called normal life with his next-door-neighbor girlfriend and her rambunctious brood. There's nothing in Spy that the audience hasn't seen before from similarly themed incarnations (think The Pacifier), but, fans will appreciate director Brian Levant's homage to Jackie Chan's past Hong Kong movie blockbusters -- most notably, Police Story and The Legend of Drunken Master -- during the opening credit sequence, which is fitting considering many of the action sequences are derivative of those films.

The main story centers on Bob's relationship with artsy single mom Gillian (Amber Valletta) and her three kids: precocious teenage stepdaughter Farren (Madeline Carroll), nerdy middle child Ian (Will Shadley), and adorably energetic Nora (Alina Foley). After an emergency sends Gillian away to Denver, Bob steps up and offers to watch the kids while she's gone. Ill-equipped to handle a situation that's clearly over his head, Bob utilizes his spy skills and gadgets -- video watch, GPS tracking, x-ray glasses -- to gain control over the situation in hopes of winning over the kid's affection, but when an old enemy escapes from prison and threatens his potential family, Bob must return to his 007 world of international espionage to protect them.

Admittedly, there's a certain level of cheese in this film, especially when it comes to the Boris-and-Natasha-style villains, Poldark (Magnús Scheving) and Creel (Katherine Boecher), whose silly Russian stereotyped performances and running joke about American fashion unabashedly border on cringe-worthy territory. Not to mention, the thinly plotted storyline involving brainiac Ian, who accidentally downloads a top-secret formula for oil-eating ooze created by the bad guys, which propels the main action of the film. Adding to the pile are the supporting cast members: George Lopez as the traitorous CIA agent, Glaze, and Billy Ray Cyrus as CIA agent and Bob's BFF Colton James, who lends folksy witticisms like "As gone as rum cake at an AA meeting."

Even so, Chan's charm wins out in the end, and The Spy Next Door's most effective sequences involve Bob's attempts to bond with the kids -- from taking little Nora shopping for a Halloween costume to helping Ian with school bullies and girls. These comedic moments more or less overshadow an otherwise simplistic narrative, and the audience can't help but smile to themselves every time Chan appears onscreen. Die-hard fans might miss the era of classic kick-ass Hong Kong action films, but Spy manages to fill that void as an entertaining alternative that kids and parents alike will enjoy. ~ Alaina O'Connor, Rovi

Scary Movie screenwriters Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer join forces to parody the "biggest" movies ever to hit the silver screen in this comedy that gives such popular box-office hits as Pirates of the Caribbean and Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe the same treatment that Scary Movie gave to the slasher subgenre. A virtual smorgasbord of spoof, Epic Movie tells the tale of four fully grown orphans: one the victim of snakes that attacked her plane, another raised by a kindly Louvre curator, the third a Mexican "libre" wrestling refuge, and the last an average mutant from an "X"-community. When the curious quartet visits a sprawling chocolate factory, they stumble across a magical wardrobe which transports them to the enchanted land of Gnarnia. It seems that the wondrous fantasy land has recently fallen under the spell of the evil White Bitch (Jennifer Coolidge), and in order to bring peace back to Gnarnia these four bumbling mortals will have to join forces with a charismatic pirate, a painfully sincere group of aspiring wizards, and one particularly libidinous lion. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi

New Jersey's leading mutant superhero (unless Jon Bon Jovi counts) rises from the sludge to defend truth, justice, and radioactive waste once again in the third sequel to the 1985 cult sensation The Toxic Avenger. There's trouble brewing in the sleepy town of Tromaville when the Diaper Mafia, a group of inept but dangerous criminals, attempt an armed takeover of Tromaville's School for the Very Special for reasons best not contemplated. With the students held hostage, the Toxic Avenger (David Mattey) is called in to save the day, but a freak accident (as if there were any other kind in this movie) leads to an accident that creates an evil mirror version of Tromaville called Amortville; what's worse, heroic Toxie finds himself trapped in Amortville, while Tromaville is cursed with his wicked counterpart, Noxie. Can Toxie make it back to Tromaville and vanquish the villainous Noxie? Will the Diaper Mafia emerge triumphant? And who knew that the Supreme Being was a foul-mouthed dwarf? Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV boasts one of Troma Team Pictures' typically eccentric supporting casts, including Corey Feldman, Ron Jeremy, Lisa Gaye, Hugh M. Hefner, Al Goldstein, Taylor Mead, Debbie Rochon, and Hank the Angry Dwarf. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi