Gary Jones Movies
Actress and writer Nia Vardalos, who became an overnight sensation with My Big Fat Greek Wedding, returns to the big screen with this gender-bending comedy. Connie (Vardalos) and Carla (Toni Collette) are best friends who've shared the same dream ever since they were teenagers -- making a name for themselves in the musical theater. However, after years of treading water on Chicago's dinner theater circuit and playing bottom-of-the-barrel nightclubs, the two are facing middle age with minimal career success. One evening after a performance, Connie and Carla have the misfortune of witnessing the murder of nightclub owner Frank (Michael Roberds) by low-level Mafiosi; the gals are seen by the shooters, and they hit the road in fear for their lives. Connie and Carla end up in Los Angeles, where they struggle to create new identities for themselves. After witnessing a drag review at a nightclub, they realize that even they have more talent than most of the men performing that evening, and they decide to pose as female impersonators in hopes of landing a gig. Connie and Carla's new act is an immediate hit, and soon they're the toast of L.A.'s gay community. But the women discover it's difficult to keep on fooling people into believing they're men, and things become even more complicated when the Mobsters discover that Connie and Carla are in Los Angeles. Meanwhile, Connie finds herself falling for Jeff (David Duchovny), a regular guy looking for his cross-dressing brother who can't understand why he's developing a crush on a drag queen. ~ Mark Deming, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Nia Vardalos, Toni Collette, (more)
Cashing in on the real-life influx of pesky "snake-head" fish in Midwestern lakes, this inexpensive sci-fi epic is set in a small Maryland fishing community called Cultus Lake. A dangerous strain of mutated snakeheads has decimated the lake's fish population, whereupon Doc Jenkins (played by X-Files' William B. Davis, aka "Cigarette-Smoking Man"), the shady owner of a nearby chemical plant, fills the water with pollutants to kill off the invaders. At the same time, the local leaders, desperate to pull Cultus Lake out of a severe financial slump, has dumped human growth hormones in the lake to improve the stock. You guessed it: Both the chemicals and hormones succeed only in making the snakeheads even larger and more ferocious--and worse still, they are now leaving the lake and crawling around on dry land, in search of human blood! Caught in the middle of the crisis is Sheriff Patrick James (Bruce Boxleitner) and the standard-issue beautiful female biologist Lori Dale (Carol Alt). An amalgam of every cheesy CGI effect ever seen on the many Jaws ripoffs that have proliferated as made-for-cable and direct-to-video thrillers, Snakehead Terror received its biggest audience when it was telecast by the Sci-Fi network on March 13, 2004. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2002
The wealthy designer of the world's first fully computer-automated jetliner summarily fires one of his engineers, a disgruntled computer hacker. In retaliation, the engineer "kidnaps" the high tech jetliner from a hidden location on the ground, and threatens to destroy the plane during its maiden flight. The lives of the passengers, which include a prominent politician and his daughter, rests in the hands of a troubled ex-war hero. First broadcast on Spanish television in an R-rated version in October of 2002, Cabin Pressure "officially" premiered on November 15, 2002, courtesy of the American PAX network. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2001
O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) smells a rat when General Hammond (Don S. Davis) steps down as head of SGC and is replaced by the hawkish General Bauer (Lawrence Dane). Almost immediately, Bauer begins demonstrating that he's dealing from the bottom of the deck by breaking up the SG-1 team and starting work on a bomb designed to destroy "unfriendly" planets. In his efforts to thwart Bauer and restore Hammond to power, O'Neill finds an ally in the form of an old nemesis. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2001
This episode takes place a decade into the future: The SG-1 team has been de-activated by the new President, the Goa'uld has been defeated, and all earthly diseases have been eradicated. This has come about thanks to the advanced technology of the Aschen, a seemingly benign alien race. But when the now-married Samantha Carter (Amanda Tapping) is given false information about her inability to bear children, it becomes obvious that the Aschen pose a sinister threat. The former SG-1 team members must send a message to their younger selves in the year 2000 to preserve the future of Mankind. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2001
The SG-1 team investigates a mysterious Abydonian sandstorm, which seems to be whispering the name of team member Jackson (Michael Shanks). Amazingly, the storm metamorphoses into a young boy named Shifu (Lane Gates)--and thus is the team reunited with the Harcesis child of the Goa'uld Apophis and Jackson's Jaffa wife Sha're. Subsequently, Jackson (Michael Shanks) is endowed with the Goa'uld genetic memory--and the changes in his personality are disturbing indeed. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2001
The SG-1 team comes across a deserted Goa'uld please palace, which houses a beautiful, mesmerizing illuminated device. Growing ecstatic when the device shines, the crew becomes psychotically despondent when the light fades--and like so many others addicted to the device, the crew begins contemplating suicide. The outcome of this hallucinogenic drama rests in the hands of Loran (Kristian Ayre), a young boy who is strangely immune to The Light's seductions. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2001
An alien lifeforce probe has succeeded in infecting the SGC computer. The technicians manage to delete this "virus", but the probe promptly regenerates itself, using its combined data. The danger is heightened when the aliens infiltrate Carter (Amanda Tapping), making her a repository for its vast collection of knowledge. In order to save the SGC base, O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) may be forced to kill Carter. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
The Russians send a distress call to the SGC when an Asgard Stargate, recovered from the ocean floor, begins wreaking havoc, creating a perpetual wormhole. The SG-1 crew teams with Soviet scientist Dr. Svetlan Markov (Marina Sirtis) to neutralize the Stargate, which has been locked into a water-covered planet. Along the way, O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) is unexpectedly reunited with the traitorous Col. Maybourne (Tom McBeath). ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
On an archeological expedition to the planet P3X 888, Jackson (Michael Shanks) discovers an ancient, primordial Goa'uld symbiote. But before he can return to the complex with this artifact, Jackson is captured by a Unas (Dion Johnstone), a huge, primitive creature. The SG-1 team would like to rescue Jackson, but their efforts are stymied by an unexpected threat. (The name of Jackson's Unas captor will undoubtedly bring a smile to the lips of anyone familiar with the 1970s Saturday-morning adventure series Land of the Lost). ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
Claiming to represent an advanced race on the planet Euronda, Alar (Rene Auberjonois) offers to share his people's technology with the Earth. In exchange, Alar solicits Earth's support in winning a war on his planet by defeating a "dangerous" enemy race. O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) is agreeable to this exchange, but Jackson (Michael Shanks) suspects that Alar is not telling the whole truth--and, as usual, Jackson is right. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
Responding to a message that has apparently been issued by his mentor Bra'tac, Teal'c (Christopher Judge) is unexpectedly reunited with his lost love Shan'auc (Musetta Vander). She claims to have found a way to communicate with her Gou'ald symbiote, and hopes to use her enhanced knowledge to destroy the Goa'uld once and for all. Skeptical at first, Teal'c is eventually convinced of Shan'auc's sincerity--but both he and Sha'auc may be victims of a deadly deception. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
The SG-1 crew's memories are wiped out by an alien ruling elite. Now O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson is convinced he is Jonah, Carter (Amanda Tapping) believes herself to be Terra, Jackson (Michael Shanks) answers only to Carlin, and Teal'c (Christopher Judge) has been "reborn" as Tor--and all four have been put to work as slave laborers in an underground facility. Refusing to accept reports that the SG-1 team has been killed, General Hammond (Don S. Davis) mounts a rescue attempt--but even if he succeeds, will the team remember anything of their past lives? ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
Season Four of Stargate SG-1 begins where the cliffhanger finale of Season Three left off, with a deadly and apparently unstoppable swarm of replicator bugs threatening to invade the earth. At the last minute, the invasion is thwarted and most of the bugs destroyed. Alas, one of the tiny scourges has managed to infiltrate the Russian submarine Blackbird and is rapidly spawning replicants. Since the Pentagon cannot destroy the sub without seriously damaging US-Soviet relations, the SG-1 team launches not one but two desperate schemes to save the day. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
Even the powerful Asgard are unable to prevent an onslaught of deadly metallic replicator bugs. In his efforts to prevent the bugs from invading earth, O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) must destroy Thor's vessel, the Beliskner--and, possibly, himself as well. Against his explicit orders, O'Neill's SG-1 team joins their leader in his suicidal mission. This final episode of Stargate SG-1's third season ends with the traditional cliffhanger, which of course would not be resolved until the beginning of Season Four. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 2000
The SG-1 lands on Edora, a planet travelling in an asteroid belt. Upon discovering that the planet is in imminent danger from "The Rain", a cataclysmic meteor shower that occurs every 150 years, the SG-1 hurries to evacuate the Edorans. Alas, in his effort to rescue the planet's leader Laira (Michele Greene), O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) is left stranded on Edora, with no hope of rescue--and the helpless SG-1 crew must struggle with the acceptance of the Inevitable. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
Twenty-two year old Carla Tate (Juliette Lewis) is a slightly mentally challenged young woman who has spent several years at a sheltered private boarding school. Now she's coming home to her wealthy parents in northern California who are emotionally ill-equipped to deal with her and are guilt ridden over sending her away in the first place. The biggest limitation Carla must now overcome is her overprotective mother Elizabeth (Diane Keaton). When she takes a class at a trade school, Carla soon meets the equally challenged Daniel (Giovanni Ribisi). Despite his limitations, he maintains a job in a bakery and lives alone. Carla dares to dream of independence and love despite her mother who refuses to view her as an adult. When Daniel fails his class, his father cuts off his funds. Facing a move to Florida to live with his mother, the two turn to each other and find a way to stay together to face a world of adult opportunities and responsibilities. ~ Ron Wells, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Juliette Lewis, Diane Keaton, (more)
- 1999
Picking up where the series' second season left off, the first episode of Stargate SG-1 finds SG-1 crew members O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson), Carter (Amanda Tapping) and Jackson (Michael Shanks) trapped on the home planet of evil Goa'uld queen Hathor (Suanne Braun). As Hathor attempts to bring O'Neill over to her side by implanting him with a Goa'uld symbiote, in the Jaffa city of Chulak Teal'c (Christopher Judge) tries to raise an army to rescue his SG-1 comrades, with the assistance of Teal'c's mentor Bra'tac (Tony Amendola). The fate of everyone may rest in a bold plan hatched by Stargate leader Gen. Hammond (Don S. Davis)--while a previous rescue attempt by the reckless Col Makepeace (Steve Majac) yields potentially dangerous side effects. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
SG-1 arrives at the primitive planet Tolla, where a volcanic eruption is destroying everything. The team manages to rescue a few surprisingly advanced humans, led by Omoc (Tobin Bell)--who are far from grateful. The Tollan Narim (Garwin Sanford) explains why the refugees are suspicious of SG-1's motives: Years earlier, Omoc's father had shared the Tollan technology with earth--resulting in a devastating war which stripped the planet of its civilization and left the surviving Tollans in a state of enslavement. As O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) tries to convince Omoc that the people of Earth have mended their ways, he is undermined by certain hawkish Pentagon officials, determined to wreak more havoc upon the hapless Tollans. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
After the Stargate malfunctions, O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson) and Carter (Amanda Tapping) are trapped near a crevasse on a frozen, uncharted planet. Despite the bitter cold, Carter is able to keep her wits about her--a good thing, too, since O'Neill is seriously injured an cannot be moved. Back at SG-1, Teal'c (Christopher Judge) and Jackson (Michael Shanks) conduct a frenzied search for their missing comrades, but with millions of planets to choose from, it is like looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack--and that "needle" is getting colder with each passing minute. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
On the devastated planet P35233, Daniel Jackson (Michael Shanks) comes upon a mirror-like alien artifact. Almost immediately, he is whisked into an alternate reality, in which he is no longer part of the Stargate program--and the earth is under attack from the Goa'ulds. Even worse, the Jaffa Teal'c (Christopher Judge) is still loyal to the Goa'ulds and is leading the attack. In his efforts to escape destruction, Jackson must also find a way to return to his own world and warn SG-1 of the horrors still to come. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
In part two of Stargate SG-1's first-season finale, the Stargate project has been determined to be a waste of money and shut down by the government. Still convinced that the Goa'ulds, led by Apophis (Peter Williams), are planning to attack the Earth, the SG-1 team defies orders and passes through the Stargate, prepared to thwart the attack by cutting it off at its source. Hopelessly trapped on a Goa'uld ship, the team members agree to sacrifice themselves for the greater good and set about to destroy the vessel. A slim hope for salvation is aroused when O'Neil (Richard Dean Anderson) discovers that his old friend and comrade in arms, the Abydonian Skaara (Alexis Cruz), is also on board the enemy ship. Alas, Skaara is now the host body of Klorel, son of Apophis -- and as zero hour approaches, it appears that Skaara/Klorel will serve only to seal the Earth's doom. This cliffhanger episode would not be resolved until "The Serpent's Lair," the opening installment of Stargate SG-1's second season. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
This opening episode of Stargate SG-1's second season resolves the "cliffhanger" established at the end of Season One. As the earth gears up for an attack from the parasitic Goa'ulds, the SG-1 team, led by Jack O'Neill (Richard Dean Anderson), is still trapped on the Goa'uld war vessel commandeered by Klorel (Alexis Cruz), son of the megalomanic enemy leader Apophis (Peter Williams). The fact that Klorel inhabits the body of Skaara, onetime close friend of O'Neill, makes his villainy all the more intolerable. Realizing that there is no hope for escape, the SG-1 crew prepares to blow up the Goa'uld ship with themselves aboard, rather than allow it to descend upon earth. At a crucial moment, a brief ray of hope is provided by the presence of Bra'tac (Tony Amendola), the mentor of SG-1's Jaffa member Teal'c (Christopher Judge). ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- 1998
On the planet P35636, Daniel Jackson (Michael Shanks) saves the life of Princess Shyla (Heather Hanson), suicidal daughter of planetary ruler Pyrus (George Touliatos). Rather than be rewarded for his fast action, Jackson and the rest of the SG-1 team are captured and put to work in the planet's Naquadah mines (an element important to the survival of Pyrus' Goa'uld enemies). Rescuing Jackson from slave labor, Shyla tells him that her father is being kept alive by the powers of a Goa'uld sarcophagus--and that once Pyrus dies, she wants Jackson to rule by her side as King. ~ Hal Erickson, All Movie Guide
- Starring:
- Amanda Tapping
