Joe E. Ross Movies
Strange but true: Gravel-voiced comic actor Joe E. Ross was once a boy tenor. In fact, while working as a singing waiter in a Bronx eatery at age 16, Ross' lilting voice was known to move hardened gangster types to sentimental tears. After Ross' voice broke (actually it shattered into a million pieces), he found success as a burlesque and nightclub comic, principally in the Miami Beach area. One of the best of the "blue" comics of the 1950s, Ross had to launder his act considerably when cast as mess sergeant Rupert Ritzik in the popular Phil Silvers sitcom You'll Never Get Rich (aka Sergeant Bilko, 1955-59). Series producer Nat Hiken starred Ross in the strikingly similar role of Bronx police officer Gunther Toody on Car 54 Where Are You, which ran from 1961 through 1963. Both Ritzik and Toody--like Ross himself--were born without taste buds (trivia collectors take notice!), both had a long-suffering wife (played by Beatrice Pons) who'd regularly stick her head out the window and shout "Listen, America! My husband is a nut!," and both exclaimed "Ooh! Ooh!" whenever excited. In 1967, Joe E. Ross co-starred with Imogene Coca as a caveman in the monumentally unsuccessful Sherwood Schwartz sitcom It's About Time, then returned to the nightclub circuit, sporadically showing up in bit roles in films as aesthetically diverse as The Love Bug (1968) and Linda Lovelace For President (1975). ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
Adapted from Dennis Potter's landmark British TV miniseries and relocated to the United States during the Depression, Pennies from Heaven dramatizes how popular songs both shaped and reflected the thoughts of people living through economic (and emotional) hardship. Arthur Parker (Steve Martin) is a sheet music salesman who believes that he can spot a hit a mile away and wants to open his own store. But he can't get a bank loan and his wife Joan (Jessica Harper), who has savings left to her by her father, refuses to give him the money. Also, while Arthur has a fierce sexual appetite, Joan generally refuses his advances. While on the road, Arthur meets Eileen (Bernadette Peters), a shy schoolteacher as desperate for affection as Arthur is hungry for sex. They begin an affair, which leads to tragedy for both. Punctuating the drama of Pennies from Heaven are elaborate musical numbers in which the characters lip-synch to popular songs of the day, which at once lift their hopes and reflect their fears. Arthur's buoyant tap number to "My Baby Said Yes" and Eileen's saucy rendition of "Love is Good for Anything That Ails You" are reflections of their needs for money and love, and their pas de deux on "Let's Face the Music and Dance" is at once an escape and an acknowledgement of their hopelessness. ~ Mark Deming, Rovi
- Starring:
- Steve Martin, Bernadette Peters, (more)
- 1981
In this television outing, condors run aerial reconnaissance to find new habitats that are free of human influence. ~ Sandra Brennan, Rovi
- 1979
- R
Not exactly meant for intellectuals or feminists, this juvenile comedy-drama centers around the competition between a decaying, old-fashioned gas station and that of a sleek, modern version across the street. Neither Uncle Joe (Huntz Hall) nor his station are doing well. So niece June (Kirsten Baker) comes to the rescue, enlisting three buxom friends with names like April (Sandy Johnson) and January (Rikki Marin) who help fill out the rest of the calendar year, and occasionally fill up tanks when not disco dancing in the garage. Using the only weapons they have, the young women wear as little as possible to distract the competition, to attract customers, to distract the gangsters sent over to teach them a lesson, and to distract attention away from the script. ~ Eleanor Mannikka, Rovi
- Starring:
- Kirsten Baker, Dennis Bowen, (more)
- 1979
- PG
The short-lived roller-disco craze of the late 1970s served as inspiration for this dated comedy, which follows the patrons of a popular roller-disco palace as they prepare for a major race. Naturally, the climactic showdown features a wholesome, upright hero (Greg Bradford) facing the fearsome challenge of a leather-clad villain (a pre-fame Patrick Swayze). ~ Judd Blaise, Rovi
- Starring:
- Scott Baio, Flip Wilson, (more)
Spoofing the entire 1940s detective genre, and his own performances as a bumbling private detective, Peter Falk plays Lou Pekinpaugh, a San Francisco private detective accused of murdering his partner at the instigation of his mistress, the partner's wife, Georgia Merkle (Marsha Mason). Police Lieutenant DiMaggio (Vic Tayback) has his eye on Lou and blunders around in a way which complicates Lou's efforts to clear his name. Lou gets a new client when Mrs. Montenegro (Madeline Kahn) and her cronies (John Housman, Paul Williams and Dom DeLuise) hire him to search out a dozen diamond eggs. Marlene DuChard (Louise Fletcher) also comes to him for help of a complicated nature. In this madcap comedy written by Neil Simon, obstacles and complications appear every few minutes, and a great many famous actors show up in hilarious cameos. ~ Clarke Fountain, Rovi
- Starring:
- Peter Falk, Ann-Margret, (more)
Based on a story by Hollywood old-timers Seton I. Miller and S. S. Field, Pete's Dragon divides its time between its flesh-and-blood characters and an animated green dragon. Pete (Sean Marshall), a lonely orphan boy in turn-of-the-century Maine, runs away from his abusive foster family. He stumbles upon a lovable dragon named Elliot, and the two become inseparable companions. Elliot is visible only to Pete, leading the townsfolk to assume that the boy is a trifle tetched. Pete finally finds happiness with his "new" family, lighthouse-keeper Lampie (Mickey Rooney) and his daughter Nora (Helen Reddy, who sings and sings). British comic actor Jim Dale co-stars as the wacky dentist Dr. Terminus. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
- Starring:
- Helen Reddy, Jim Dale, (more)
In Kingdom of the Spiders a swarm of huge tarantulas, enraged by the misuse of pesticides, try to take over their part of the world. Dr. Robert Hansen (William Shatner), a local Arizona veterinarian joins forces with entomologist Diane Ashley (Tiffany Bolling) to keep the spider population under control. Woody Strode and Altovise Davis also appear as the owners of a neighboring ranch. Unstylishly directed by John Cardos and produced with a sense of humor by "Arachnid Productions," -- and despite bad dialogue, wooden acting and poor special effects -- Kingdom of the Spiders has become a cult classic and favorite of several generations of giant insect horror film buffs. ~ Linda Rasmussen, Rovi
- Starring:
- William Shatner, Tiffany Bolling, (more)
- 1976
- R
When a group of teenage girls gather together for a slumber party, they spend the night relating stories of how they lost their virginity. Debra Winger makes her screen debut in this film. ~ Iotis Erlewine, Rovi
- Starring:
- Noelle North, Bridget Hollman, (more)
Voter apathy in the United States is at an all-time high, and the general consensus of the American attitude is that there simply isn't anyone worth voting for. A multi-ethnic, politically diverse committee comes together to name a new candidate that America can really get behind. When someone jokingly suggests famous porn star Linda Lovelace, the committee members realize that it isn't such a crazy idea after all ("At least she knows how to use her head!"). Lovelace agrees to run for president, the Upright Party is formed, and a cross-country campaign tour is launched. Her journey is full of ribald adventures in small towns, big cities, and rural spots along the highway, and she's loved by the people everywhere she goes. Unfortunately, that makes the Dirty Guys in Washington upset, so they send for The Assassinator (Chuck McCann) to make sure that Lovelace doesn't live to claim her rightful spot as leader of the free world. This wacky softcore sex farce features an assortment of celebrities in cameo roles, including Micky Dolenz, Scatman Crothers, Joe E. Ross, and Vaughn Meader. ~ Fred Beldin, Rovi
- Starring:
- Linda Lovelace
- 1974
- R
This sex farce stars Angus Duncan as a lothario on a mission to sleep with five very different women. ~ Jason Ankeny, Rovi
- 1973
- PG
Frasier the Sensuous Lion would seem to have been conceived as a racy "answer" to Disney's sugary-sweet animal comedies. The talkative title character is befriended by zoologist Marvin Feldman (Michael Callan). When Frasier's loquaciousness becomes public knowledge, Feldman tries to save the lion from being commercially exploited by a sleazy California wildlife preserve. The film's supporting cast includes such TV perennials as Frank De Kova ("Wild Eagle" on F Troop) and Malachi Throne ("Noah Bain" on It Takes a Thief). Frasier's innuendo-laden dialogue is supplied by, of all people, Victor Jory. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
- 1972
Worried that she's losing her powers, Samantha's lookalike cousin, Serena, decides to settle down to mortal-hood. So that she won't have to bother herself with such exigencies as finding honest work, Serena aims to wed Darrin's wealthiest client, Harrison Woolcott (Peter Lawford). Realizing that such a union would be disastrous, Sam tries to break up the romance, only to be beaten to the punch by one Contessa Piranha (Ellen Weston). Written by Michael Morris, "Serena's Richcraft" first aired on January 22, 1972. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
- Starring:
- Elizabeth Montgomery, Dick Sargent, (more)
1970s favorite Chris Robinson and the venerable Sidney Blackmer star in Revenge is My Destiny. Robinson plays a Vietnam vet who returns home to his wife. His home is there, but his wife isn't. When the authorities prove to be no help, Robinson cuts a violent swath across the countryside in search of his missing missus. Filmed in Miami,Revenge is My Destiny is an interesting pre-Rambo example of a hero who uses his "Nam smarts" in a peacetime situation. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
- 1970
- R
Rita Hayworth's once bright star fell a little closer to Earth after she appeared in this sleazy exploitation crime drama as a seductive matron living in Miami with her wheel-chair bound, wealthy husband. Frustrated, she beds a young author and then becomes his sugar momma. The writer uses her generous funds to hold wild parties where participants freely ingest LSD. Unfortunately the gravy train abruptly derails when the husband finds out. A struggle ensues and the writer kills him. A police investigation deems the death accidental, but Hayworth knows the truth and uses it to blackmailing the writer into sleeping with her. That doesn't last long for he kills her too and then starts having sex with her daughter who gets bloody revenge in the end. ~ Sandra Brennan, Rovi
The inept Ensign Garland (Robert Morse) battles a trio of jewel thieves in this Walt Disney comedy. Garland starts by spilling paint on the lovely Kate Fairchild (Stephanie Powers). Harry (Phil Silvers), Max (Norman Fell) and Charlie (Mickey Shaughnessy) try to recover the jewels accidentally dumped by Garland into a picnic basket. Garland's superior is Commander Taylor (Don Ameche), who hounds the harried ensign for being a constant bumbler. Jason Bennett (Wally Cox) is the playboy who has replaced his yacht engine with a wine cellar. Character actors Joe E. Ross and Al Lewis witness the sight gags and react to the seafaring shenanigans. ~ Dan Pavlides, Rovi
- Starring:
- Robert Morse, Stefanie Powers, (more)
- 1969
- R
In this complex drama, a diver saves a stripper who is tossed off of a passing boat in the Caribbean ocean. He then helps her back to Miami where they discover that followers of Castro have ransacked her apartment to search for a valuable package given to her by her murdered boyfriend, a Cuban refugee. The two then head back for the Bahamas. Unfortunately they are followed and so to escape the hunters, they return to the Miami nightclub where she works. It is there that they find the package, which contains a valuable jewel. They give it to the club belly dancer whor places it in her navel. The thieves try to grab it, but she gracefully tosses it to the young couple. They use the jewel to help support the anti-Castro movement. ~ Sandra Brennan, Rovi
Those who worried that the Disney studio would collapse without the presence of the late Uncle Walt were put at ease when the profits starting rolling in for The Love Bug. The "star" is Herbie, a lovable little Volkswagen with a personality all its own. Abused by a bad guy race-car driver (David Tomlinson), Herbie is rescued by a good guy racer (Dean Jones). Out of gratitude, Herbie enables the luckless good guy to win one race after another. The real fun begins when the ruthless hot-rodder connives to get Herbie back through fair means or foul. Based on a story by Gordon Buford, The Love Bug inspired two equally lucrative sequels, Herbie Rides Again and Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo. ~ Hal Erickson, Rovi
- Starring:
- Dean Jones, Michele Lee, (more)
- 1968
This exploitation film about the evils of marijuana finds art teacher Phil Blake (Fabian) discovering some of his students are smoking pot. Although he admits to the students he tried it himself in college, he is dumber than a bag of hammers about student drug use. Phil has eyes for fellow teacher Ellie (Diane McBain) until he discovers she is the main dealer, along with the star of the football team. Included in the cast is actress (Patty McCormick), all grown up since her appearance in Bad Seed, and Terri Garr, who makes a brief appearance as a student. This unintentionally laughable film, a feeble attempt to cash in on the sensationalism of marijuana use, was co-written by Richard Gautier and Peter Marshall of "Hollywood Squares" television fame. This film, along with similarly overblown 1930s anti-marijuana diatribes, cost the "straight" world a great deal of credibility at the time, and it became an instant "camp" classic. ~ Dan Pavlides, Rovi
- Starring:
- Fabian, Diane McBain, (more)
Frank Sinatra brings a sneering Rat Pack ethos to his first hard-boiled detective role in Tony Rome. Tony is an ex-cop who lives on a houseboat off Miami, accepting fees for private-eye work. His former partner, Ralph Turpin (Robert J. Wilke), asks Tony for help in locating Diana Pines (Sue Lyon), the daughter of rich construction magnate Rudolph Kosterman (Simon Oakland). Tony finds her unconscious and drunk in a sleazy motel room and returns her to her home. Rudolph decides to hire Tony in order to find out why his daughter is behaving so erratically. In the meantime, Diana's stepmother, Rita (Gena Rowlands), also offers Tony money to inform her first about whatever Tony finds out. He discovers that Diana has lost an expensive diamond pin, but before he can act upon the information, he is beaten up by two goons and nearly killed by Diana's crazy step-uncle. Tony then finds out that Turpin has been murdered. With help from sultry and sexy divorcée Ann Archer (Jill St. John), Tony discovers that Diana has been funneling large sums of money to her alcoholic mother, Lorna (Jeanne Cooper), with Rita's priceless jewelry being replaced by fakes. A collection of disagreeable human sludge all take their turns trying to get Tony and the information that he holds -- including his old pal Lieutenant Santini (Richard Conte). After a murder attempt on Rudolph's life, Tony uncovers a series of vile connections involving blackmail, deceit, and betrayal. ~ Paul Brenner, Rovi
- Starring:
- Frank Sinatra, Jill St. John, (more)
- 1961
This is a somewhat serviceable, light comedy by prolific director Norman Taurog (a favored helmer of Elvis Presley and Jerry Lewis films). Squeaky-clean Pat Boone is a singing lieutenant who has to briefly ship out to the Aleutians and regrettably leave Sally (Barbara Eden), his new love behind. Taking off with the ship is a stowaway turkey, nurtured by Garfield (Buddy Hackett), a zany sailor with a soft heart for the avian critter. The problem is, the turkey has a special attachment to the captain (Dennis O'Keefe). By the time the ship docks in Long Beach again, the turkey and an amorous pelican have produced a strange-looking egg, and Sally has just smuggled herself onboard, anxious to see her lieutenant. Now comes the inspection of the ship by Commander Bintle (Gale Gordon). ~ Eleanor Mannikka, Rovi
- Starring:
- Pat Boone, Buddy Hackett, (more)
